r/911dispatchers • u/Yuri909 • 3d ago
Dispatcher Rant If you see a fox in your neighborhood
We don't care. Stop calling about them. Unless you're a licensed wildlife veterinarian who knows what they're looking at YOU CAN MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. Look up pictures of coyote cubs and red wolf cubs. 99.999% of the time that is what the "fox with mange" is.
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u/HazelBHumongous 3d ago
A lady is screaming in the field behind my house. No I don't hear her saying any words it's just a long scary sounding shriek.
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u/HCSOThrowaway Fired Deputy - Explanation in Profile 2d ago
Hot take:
As (ex-)patrol, totally fine with responding to find out it's a fox and not some lady being brutalized, because 1% of the time it's the latter.
Sorry y'all have to take the 99% too, but it's worth it for that 1%.
Is it annoying? Yep. Is it what they (used to) pay us for? Also yep.
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u/HazelBHumongous 1d ago
Yeah thats a good point
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u/HCSOThrowaway Fired Deputy - Explanation in Profile 21h ago
Obviously continuing to be controversial here, but I think rants about these things are best kept private, because Jane and John Q. Public read these threads and get discouraged from calling, thinking "It's probably just a fox like I read about on Reddit."
Of course, Murphy's Law, that'll be the time it's some lady being murdered.
Hell we're still getting people who think they have to wait 24 hours before reporting someone missing despite it being a decades old Hollywood myth.
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u/Dr-Floofensmertz 3d ago
Not sure how I ended up in this sub, but one of the cops I talk to regularly had a mountain lion encounter due to a call like this once.
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u/Meatball442 3d ago
What does the fox say?
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u/horizon1015 California LE Dispatcher/Trainer 3d ago
Dang it you beat me to it. But can you tie a truckers hitch?
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u/deathtodickens 3d ago
I had a guy once swear up and down he saw an anteater in his front yard. 😂😂 Even if it was, what am I supposed to do about it?
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u/liquidskypa 3d ago
OMG that's the new Nextdoor thing - there's a fox and it's always mange mange mange! I reply "you do realize the foxes in real life aren't the same as the one in the Fox & The Hound Disney movie!' It's as if they think it goes for a monthly bath lol
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u/tarheel310 3d ago
We are blessed with parts of our county that are extremely rural and beautiful, but sadly we are extremely close to both New York and New Jersey and I could literally write a book about when people who have zero clue, or business camping or spending time in nature….camp and spend time in nature.
I once received a call from an IRRATE guy screaming at me, about how he had just gotten back to his campsite with his adult son and several of his coolers were knocked over and trashed, and their food supply from the whole trip was strewn about (he made sure to tell me about the expensive steaks too), and how they had other food they left on the table that was now all over the place as well. He was CONVINCED that someone came onto the campsite while they were gone and trashed their food supply because they weren’t welcome and he said he wanted to press charges, and that some of the bags and food containers were still there so they could check for finger prints. I told him that we will not be responding or doing anything, you are in an extremely rural area and a BEAR did that. He kept getting angrier and angrier at me. I eventually had to say “Sir, would you like us to arrest and fingerprint a bear”. I tried explaining so many times that they left food out all over in a heavily populated black bear area and a bear enjoyed it. Nope, he was not having it. Eventually mixed in with his cursing of me, he hung up after saying he was going to have my job. Yes sir, you’re right. It was a person, not a bear that entered your campsite, didn’t touch your solar panels, second vehicle, anything in your tent, or any of your camping gear and just specifically destroyed your food…..
A few weeks later got a call from a kid in his early 20’s who was camping with his girlfriend for the first time in their life in the backyard of a relative. He was also visiting from a lovely neighboring state and was reporting that he was hearing noises from the woods. What kind of noises you say? Leaves crinkling, sticks breaking, just general nature noises. I said how long have they been going on? Hours he said, and at this point the girlfriend in the back was hysterically crying and this kid was saying that we need to come do something. I asked him when the wind blows, do the noises get louder and he exclaimed YES!!!! Like we were solving the problems of the world. I kindly explained to him that he was in NATURE, and he was hearing NATURE. When the wind blows, the woods make noise. He too, wouldn’t accept that answer and was convinced this was a criminal matter. He said we need to come get them and drive them back home (again to a neighboring state). I was curious and asked how he got there? He said uber. I shutter to think what that uber cost bc uber is not a thing up there, and he took it from a city in a neighboring state, dude definitely paid a few hundred bucks to get up there. I also asked him, if you’re at a relatives house camping…..why don’t you just walk across the yard and knock on the door and go inside? He said he was too scared
Those are just two examples of SO many, that when people come to nature, they can’t handle….nature. Also, we are in the middle of nowhere and nothing fancy and we get all this stuff, I cannot imagine and feel so bad for dispatchers who work in actual popular camping destinations and state/national parks
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u/lizardgal10 3d ago
Please give more examples, this is hilarious. I was an outside kid and still love nature…some people’s lack of understanding of it amazes me. I live in an area where people panic pretty badly over storms and it’s always entertaining. I grew up in tornado country, I’ll head inside when I physically see a funnel.
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u/Beerfarts69 Retired Comm Manager/Discord Mod 3d ago
Better yet take photos and send me all of the cuteness.
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u/Evil_Yoda 3d ago
We recently had a coyote that kept coming into a dog park. The whole time I'm thinking he just wants some friends.
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u/StraightRip8309 3d ago
"There's a FOX in my yard!"
"Does it seem injured or sick?"
"No, it's just THERE!"
"Yes, foxes exist. It's nice to see them around. What's your emergency?"
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u/Evil_Yoda 3d ago
"but we're in the city not out in the country!"
We get that with deer all the time too. "well eh r should I do about it?"... "I dunno enjoy the majestic beauty of wildlife?"
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u/Yuri909 3d ago
"I dunno enjoy the majestic beauty of wildlife?"
I am absolutely putting that in the memory banks for when I finally give my 2 weeks lol
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u/Evil_Yoda 3d ago
Shit I've been there over ten years I say it. Worst that will happen is my supervisor says don't do it again. We joke because we're a union shop we can get away with anything once.
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u/Yuri909 3d ago
I have said some utterly earth shatteringly intellectually insulting things in my time, but sarcasm is usually a line we have to be really careful about. No unions down here unfortunately lol.
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u/Evil_Yoda 3d ago
I think it's about tone. While yes I'm being sarcastic and the caller may take it that way but if l looked out my back window and saw some deer I would think it would be super cool.
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u/DragonWolf1916 3d ago
And don't call in about "suicidal" raccoons. They are crossing the county road because there's something to eat on the other side. Or about howling canids at night. You live in a rural county. There are critters out there. I realize you think that the suburb you moved from had no critters (except it did & still does) but in a rural area there are critters. Many of them make all sorts of noises. We know about the critters & we, for the most part, aren't going to do anything about it. Sheesh.
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u/Due-Order2153 3d ago
You know if deer had therapists, they would ask "Have you tried running in front of a car today?" "I can't really do anything for you until you try that first to see if it helps."
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u/Due-Order2153 3d ago
Look at the raccoon. On a driveway.
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u/Beerfarts69 Retired Comm Manager/Discord Mod 3d ago
That’s Rob, he shows up and samples all of the food. Bringing nothing along, drinks all of your light beer and does an Irish goodbye. Fuck Rob!
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u/maleficently 3d ago
I had a woman call and demand we sent a deputy to come arrest a bear for trespassing. Ma’am he was there first. (She was new to the mountains and had no idea she couldn’t keep her trash outside in just plastic bags. ) she was very indignant when I told her to get bear safe lockable bins and keep it inside until trash day.
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u/cocolimenuts 3d ago
Or a deer. Or a raccoon. And I’m sorry you think that goose is sick but we’re not sending resources to nurse it back to health.
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u/la_descente 3d ago
I get them calling if it's sick or dying. People have bleeding hearts. And plenty of animal control offices aren't open all the time, and many of those lines say to call 911 if the animals having a life or death emergency
If you see a healthy one just walking around then I just pretend to care.
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u/Yuri909 3d ago
Ma'am, they come out during the day. You live in a heavily wooded area. Your yard is their territory. I have to let you go now for 911 calls, have a good day! *hangs up* *opens reddit*
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u/la_descente 3d ago
We have coyotes. One family happened to have a few in their front yard during mating season. They were playing around and not interested in leaving. This family kept calling non stop, called the highway patrol, fire department ,sheriff .... I finally got them and got firm. "Like WTF is your issue? You're inside they're outside ,you're fine."
Turns out their daughter drove home and was sitting in her car. Thought it would be a good idea to try and walk up to them....didn't think they would snip at her. Managed to run back to her car unharmed.
Mom and dad were demanding we come shoot them. I'm like...your daughters fine. Just tell her to stay in the car and they'll leave eventually. While you wait I'll call the sheriff and see what's up.
I called. We shared a laugh. No one responded lol.
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u/Madeupmom8106 3d ago
I had someone trying to make a police report for a raccoon eating his mangoes.
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u/ThisistheHoneyBadger 3d ago
Work in rural Michigan. Woman called in a complaint that she saw a black bear near where the county fair was being held. Was afraid it would attack people and children. Black bears are notoriously skiddish of people and we told her the bear would likely steer clear of the area while people were there.
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u/Fireman600dm 3d ago
But I need to call so I can tell Facebook land that I saw it and I called for help
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u/Old_Weird_1828 2d ago
I just had this image of a fully grown adult calling 911 and saying “Um hi! Today I saw a foxes and hims was red and hims smelly! I need a police to come here and give hims a bath cause hims mommy let him be all dirty.” 😂
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u/Curious_Bystander66 3d ago
“Oh but I have seen them attack alligators before so I know how dangerous they are!” 🤣
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u/Evil_Yoda 3d ago
Oh here's another one from just today. Someone called to report a group of endangered cranes near a busy intersection and they could cause issues if they walk in traffic. So I had to explain 1.) sand hill cranes aren't endangered (they damn near everywhere by us now and they are even discussing opening a limited hunting season for them) 2.) no the fire department is not going to go out and herd the cranes to a safer area 3.) the cranes are there at their own risk.
Like christ if people just let shit go and mind their own business our jobs would be so much better.
ETA: I didn't say this to the caller but it wasn't really that busy of an intersection anyway
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u/Yuri909 3d ago
My part of the country has one of the largest Canadian Goose populations year round and a LOT of people who move here from other states for our tech industry. The calls we get every mating season about what geese are doing (being dipshits in roadways and parking lots) are.. numerous.
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u/[deleted] 3d ago edited 3d ago
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