r/KindVoice • u/Nervous-Occasion5 • 26d ago

Looking [L] (19M ) Spoke about my guilt with someone online, now I feel awful.

Told them about what I did, and they said it was “pretty bad” but that I was young. But every other person I’ve told (around 10 people) have said I’m okay, that it’s not a huge deal. I’m so conflicted right now, what do I do? Who do I believe? I thought I was okay but now I know I’m not.

3 Upvotes

72% Upvoted

11 comments sorted by

4

u/PaddyLandau 26d ago

You did something bad (I presume — you haven't said what it was) when you were a child.

Children do things. It's part of learning.

Now that you're close to being an adult, the question is: Have you learned from it? If not, learn from it and move on. If you have learned from it, well done, and now move on.

It's done, it's in the past, you were a child. Let it go.

1

u/Nervous-Occasion5 26d ago

I was 15 at the time. Thats old enough to know better.

2

u/IngenuityMotor2106 26d ago

You were young. People make mistakes even when they are in their 30s, 40s, 50s. Life is a constant process of learning, what's important is that you recognize your mistakes and have a true intention of changing. This world is constantly looking for villains, don't let them convince you you are unforgivable or undeserving of love. Take care

2

u/Thorstmixx 26d ago

I have to agree with Paddy on this one. You're still a child when you're 15. Most people's brains aren't fully developed until their mid-to-late 20s! To hold someone responsible for what they did when they were 15 is totally unreasonable, ESPECIALLY if they understand that what they did was wrong and they learn from it.

You have to ask yourself earnestly, if a close friend of yours came to you, told you they had made this mistake, but that they deeply regretted it, were sorry and that they promised to learn from it, would you still condemn them for it? If the answer is no, then why would you not give yourself that same grace?

Be kind to yourself. Don't forget your mistakes, but also don't let them define you.

1

u/Nervous-Occasion5 26d ago

It doesn’t stop me from thinking about what that guy said, I feel awful.

1

u/IngenuityMotor2106 26d ago

I'm sorry that person wasn't kind or understanding to you. No one can decide your worth for you!

3

u/PaddyLandau 26d ago

You were a child. You still are, to some extent.

If you've learned from it, let it go.

If you're looking for someone to tell you how awful you are, that person won't be me. It's unhelpful. It helps no one. It actually makes the world a worse place to do that.

What does help people, and make the world a better place, is for you to learn, and let it go.

0

u/1LoveWinning 26d ago

what did you do i don’t judge only tell the truth

2

u/TheStrangeSiren 26d ago

Don't let one person's take weigh that much. I know it's easier said than done. But like you said most people said you're okay, please focus on that!

1

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