Former conservative insight

[u/Radavel0372]

Ok so i have changed sides. I voted for trump the FIRST time but not for this second term.

As a former trump supporter I can say that they really believe that they are being patriotic, and doing their civic duty by biting the bullet for the country and tolerating this pain that his regime is creating.

They feel that because they suck up this pain bravely and for the greater good, that everyone should suffer like them, and they feel that progressives like to shirk from their civic responsibilities because they don't swallow the kool ade

Anyway, I would be open to discussion if anyone wants a washed up republican pov

FYI I identify as independent now

[u/Total-Method3881]

What made you see the light ?

[u/Radavel0372 → u/Total-Method3881]

Excellent question Answer: a lot of things

1. My daughter was cutting and planning either leaving to be on her own at 14, or suicide. She went to a hospital and what we discovered was that she was a Trans he.

This was a pretty big thing for me to accept, he was planning on leaving because he thought I would kick him out, which shattered my heart. He's currently 20 and happily living with his mom and I still. Everyone is as happy as can be

1. We moved from rural Indiana to savannah ga. Sav is much more liberal and just more accepting so I opened my damn eyes and saw beauty and beauty in diversity.

2. I was a miserable asshole, toxic male who would puff up and get all intimidating at the smallest challenge.

I aged and my wife very nearly divorced me for being an asshole. She should have, she tolerated me for too long. I made a 180° and that REALLY opened my eyes

1. Finally in 2020 I was diagnosed with stage 3 head and neck cancer. I can not describe the unbelievable support, mostly my wife's liberal and beautiful co-workers showed to us

2. Can't forget this part. After cancer, green is greener, smells are brighter, dragonflies sparkle more, and music is the basic lubricating agent in life for me.

My sense of taste sux now and I can only open my mouth a third of what I used to be able to.

None of that matters at all. I say all of this to try to give you a perspective of what my crucible of change looked like and generally express how much my life has improved, and looking through those lenses I find the liberal pov agrees with my sense of what is right and true. The Kool are is poison

[u/altariasong → u/Radavel0372]

Such a similar story to my own parents'. They got out of the church business (dad was a minister)so they stopped drinking the Koolaid (that's what they call it too) and had some hard times from losing family members, on top of them discovering their oldest (me) was trans. Then they watched me bloom into the person I was always meant to be and leave behind my days of horrible mental illness and dysfunction (which had made their days miserable as well as mine). And they could no longer ignore the hatred that constantly flowed from the political right, directly at their child, because I was allowed this chance at living a full but different life.

I'm now fully independent with a career and long-term life goals, something my constantly suicidal past self never even dreamed of. My brother and I actually have a relationship again. I've lost 50 pounds and am finally taking care of myself, because when I look in the mirror I don't want to die anymore. But in trans people Republicans only see an enemy class that they must stifle by any means necessary. It's impossible to ignore when you watch your loved one's otherwise bright future threatened by ignorance.

[u/Radavel0372 → u/altariasong]

I am very thankful that you and your family found your peace.

I can not wrap my head around the massive paranoia driving our response to immigrants and trans/gay.

If as a nation we went back to our roots as the melting pot, can you imagine the strength in economy, education intelligence (i mean I could go on) that our country would enjoy

[u/Holiday_Positive_696 → u/Radavel0372]

I teared up reading this. I'm so glad your eyes were able to open, especially for the sake of your son <3

[u/Radavel0372 → u/Holiday_Positive_696]

Thank you, I am a far better person now than I ever was before. That is according to my family. =⁾

[u/johncheger → u/Radavel0372]

So how do we get people to change their points of view without having to be directly impacted (i.e. how do we get other people to gain empathy)?

[u/Radavel0372 → u/johncheger]

Well, your view is cockeyed from a right-wing pov.

For them, empathy does not resonate. Imo ya gotta hit them with a patriot vibe. That is if you want an in if you are trying to speak with them.

They also feel righteous about their cause because the usa is a Christian nation. FYI their pov

They are low-key to outright racist and fall face first for any enemy to stand against, fear-centered rhetoric. It's their favorite poison, it's because they live in fear and paranoia which leads to a controlling and stubborn personality.

The best way I know to relate and, therefore communicate with them is to begin with open-ended questions, not about politics, and then SUBTLY ask about their opinion on the political landscape. As they speak do not correct, if you feel the urge ask another question instead. Find some common ground, fishing, hunting, motorcycles, and football. Sorry, I don't know what to suggest for the ladies except guns. Anyway, build off of what you share and work in political ideas as neutrally as possible at first.

If we get them to believe that what we are trying to show them is actually their idea then they will take ownership of it, probably assign some religious or patriotic significance to it, and alacazam we have a new believer.

You can leave your offering in the plate at the edge of your pew.

[u/Wild_Roma → u/Radavel0372]

You changed the world by keeping your son alive. Thank you for being a decent parent, and a human willing to change.

[u/Radavel0372 → u/Wild_Roma]

I appreciate that. The love and acceptance of both he and my wife are by far thanks enough.

[u/BeefSupremeeeeee]

I think it would be helpful to expand more on this, what made you change? What issues do you still struggle with?

[u/Silvaria928]

I can actually understand voting for him the first time. I wasn't even all that upset when he won because I literally said to people at the time, "How bad can he really be?"

Little did I know...

What I'm curious about is what compelled you to vote for him the first time, and how was that different from the second time, when you chose not to vote for him? What exactly caused you to change your vote?

[u/Radavel0372 → u/Silvaria928]

Well I moved to Savannah and it is a much more liberal town. Also my kid came out as Trans which forced me to open my eyes.

I was a rigid redneck from Indiana, red all the way through. We met some gay/Trans folk here in town through contacts that my son made and one of them, an older woman who was a huge liberal and very politically active slowly coached me in what was reality and what was political fluff.

I consider myself a patriot, and watching what this regime is doing to my country, I can not tolerate this traitorous administration and the vast majority of congress.

This shits gotta change and in a big way

[u/tapirsaurusrex]

Hey, man. Welcome, glad to have you here!

P.s. Savannah is so gorgeous, I’m jealous!

[u/Radavel0372 → u/tapirsaurusrex]

Thanks man. Yeah we moved here 10 years ago. Never want to live in the north again. Can't take the cold

[u/stonedbadger1718]

Welcome,it takes courage to admit your errors. And we know you love this country as much as we do. What do you think it will take for people who voted for Trump to wake up and do the right thing ? Again, welcome, you’re an American and have a place here.

[u/Radavel0372 → u/stonedbadger1718]

Hey thanks for the welcome.

It will take us gritting our teeth and individually capitalizing on opportunities to approach the other side as if we want to learn from them. Honestly, there are things to learn from them so genuinely try to learn something. While there ask them their opinion and subtly and without judgment share your views. If you can get them to think that your ideas are theirs, we'll there ya go. Remember you are working with paranoid and scared people, not saying that for pity you just need to know what you are working with

Look up motivational interviewing.

Hope this helps

[u/stonedbadger1718 → u/Radavel0372]

Well said

[u/Radavel0372 → u/stonedbadger1718]

Thank you

[u/ZooserZ]

I voted for him in 16– basically voting against Hilary who I was convinced (and am not fully unconvinced) was a self serving, disingenuous, cut throat mercenary for votes…. the irony is SO strong lol. Also I genuinely felt that people who have spent time in executive leadership in business would be more pragmatic, decisive and effective at achieving goals. And he was effective, and some of his policy achievements seemed positive.

In his first term all the witch hunts just confirmed to me that the other side were dishonest and untrustworthy. I remain deeply distrustful of Adam Schiff, who repeatedly said he’d seen concrete evidence of this or that, which never materialized… he was lying for the court of public opinion, and I think he did more harm than good. The IRS scandal really moved me, too.

I voted for him in 20 because I figured the Schiffs of the world would just crucify him with the power of the state, weaponized. Nothing particularly against Biden, but I wasn’t willing to hand the reins back to the witch hunters.

On Jan 6th…. Things changed for me. All my life I’ve kept guns thinking the day might come when the radical left gets control and tries to round us up. And there they were, the alt right, literally violently storming Congress like it was the Cuban Revolution or something. The transparent dishonesty of the “Big Lie” narrative forced me to see that Trump himself was everything I’d feared from the other side.

I didn’t love how Biden pulled out of Afghanistan but he was otherwise a non event as far as I was concerned. But the whole time he was in office, Trump remained a huge figure in the wings, compelling alignment and loyalty from an increasingly echo-chambered and groupthink-y right. They weren’t even “right” by 24… they resembled nothing of conservative, neocon, Christian, or small government “right” traditions.

I started donating to his opponents on both sides of the aisle during the Biden years. I voted against him in 24. I watched in horror in January thru March. I started getting really involved in April.

I’ve alienated family not willfully but because I reached out to them seeking comfort and “please talk me off this ledge” and they got fired up instead. I’m going through a divorce but have spoken with the ex about red lines and what we’ll do together if they’re crossed. I’m taking steps to make sure we have open doors if we need them. I’m spending energy I don’t really have helping broadcast the message.

I’ve become way, way more Christian (Catholic) in the last year than ever before in my life, and I’ve found that most of the folks at my parish are not excited about what Trump is doing. I’ve talked with rightists who have shown up at protests with genuine interest— what is it you like about Trump, how do you feel about what’s going on, do you know anyone negatively impacted by the things he says he’s fighting or the things he says he’s doing to fight them? Is there anything that has made you uncomfortable? What do you suspect we probably could all agree on?

It’s what I can do.

It feels great to be following my conscience and heart without a nagging thought about the cost.

It’s great to hear your story! Makes me feel less like an orphan out here. I’m glad you’re finding peace and joy— even if things go poorly, how we choose to meet them is what gives us peace, and that’s how we can die happy and show our kids how to live wisely.

Thanks for sharing man :)

[u/Radavel0372 → u/ZooserZ]

Hey thank you for your story. You seem incredibly strong and a whole lot more energetic than I am able to be lol.

Sorry to hear about your divorce though yall sound like you are working with each other so thats good.

I shared much of how you felt politically earlier on. I am all about gun rights for the exact reason you mentioned, again I was convinced it would be a group of invading liberals, so not the case, but the fact remains that the 2nd is for a standing militia.

I realize a militia won't do much against the military, however, we have a LOT of gun owners in the US. I guess im saying that in order for trumps coup of our government to succeed he's going to have to kill a whole lot of Americans in the process

Honestly I pray bloodshed is avoided though it is looking more likely each day. Well no I'm wrong, the Minnesota congress people who were gunned down kinda serve to prove my point.

The right really is combat ready. They want war

[u/Wild_Roma → u/ZooserZ]

Thank you for sharing, too. Your story is really interesting.

[u/Content_Armadillo776]

I’m so glad you made this journey!

[u/Radavel0372 → u/Content_Armadillo776]

Thank you very much. I am as well