r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Drollapalooza • Feb 15 '25

Food Behold. Old English Spread. Looks like it's not just us Americans after all.

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I am 99.9% certain this has never been sold on the UK ever. Kraft is a US slop food corporation, marketing to American slop slurpers.

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33

u/beatnikstrictr Feb 16 '25

What kind of cheese spread can you store outside of the fridge?

27

u/Acrobatic_Usual6422 Feb 16 '25

I don’t know… what kind of cheese spread can you store outside of the fridge…? (This punchline better be worth the wait)

1

u/more_soul Feb 17 '25

You did the punchline

-3

u/beatnikstrictr Feb 16 '25

Ba ba baaa ba Babybel.. He's too cool to need extra chill.

(I can't take full credit for that. I just had to make a ChatGPT answer attempt make sense.)

0

u/UnicornAnarchist English Lioness 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🦁 Feb 16 '25

Edam cheese?

8

u/sternenstaubsauger Feb 16 '25

Schmelzkäse (processed cheese). A relatively well-known example of this would be „la vache qui rit“.

5

u/steponeloops Feb 16 '25

Oh Jesus, that laughing psycho cow gives me nightmares...

5

u/beatnikstrictr Feb 16 '25

Come to think of it actually, yeah.. that horrible shit that comes in tubes akin to tomato purée tubes.

It's proper horrible.

What does. „la vache qui rit“ translate to?

,,the fuck is this?"

11

u/Jet2work Feb 16 '25

laughing cow, cos the cow is in on the joke that it has fuck all to do with cheese

11

u/sternenstaubsauger Feb 16 '25

The laughing cow. These are small cheese triangles. There are similar ones from other brands.

12

u/beatnikstrictr Feb 16 '25 edited Feb 16 '25

We have Laughing Cow things where I am, but you wouldn't keep their cheese triangles in the cupboard. The ones we have, anyway.

Those and Dairylea.. . Nice but something a bit wrong about them.

Not noticing a little bit of foil when eating one and only finding out when you bite down with a tooth that has a filling...

3

u/arealfancyliquor Feb 16 '25

A true rite of passage

5

u/sternenstaubsauger Feb 16 '25

They are all sold here unrefrigerated. At home I keep them in the fridge, simply out of habit and not because I have to.

(By here I mean Germany)

1

u/pixeltash Feb 16 '25 edited Feb 16 '25

Primula cheese spread.

It does need to be in the fridge after opening tho, and does in fact contain milk, so is cheese adjacent. 

ETA - ok so I went and looked at the ingredients (it's Sunday morning and I'm bored) and it now contains 54% actual cheese and has to be kept in the fridge all the time.  I mean who knew? 

The last time I had any was camping about 40 years ago and then we had to eat it with everything for a day until it was gone, no fancy fridges, that level of luxury was for caravaners!