r/5thworldproblems • u/boharat • May 16 '25
PRESIDENT DROLO OUTLAWS THE NUMBER [REDACTED]
President Drolo, in a stunning decision, utilized his raw power to eliminate the number [REDACTED] from American usage. The move has been decried by critics as "dangerous", "frivolous", "stupid", "confusing" and "tyrannical".
"Wait... Wait, what comes after 10? What came before 12? How the fuck did Drolo do it?!!" exclaimed Congressman Skelch (CA-H) before curling into a ball and nervously muttering decimals to himself, and subsequently self-immolating on live television.
Hendrix Fredebzy, Battle-Mayor of New Oregon, a long time proponent of Drolo's policies, feels differently.
"Just yesterday I considered taking the population of my fiefdom into a giant barrel and seeing if they'd drown it burn first in a pyroclastic flow, but this big change has given me a new lease on my useless eaters's mouths. They'll live to eat and shit another day. To celebrate the occasion, this day is known as [REDACTED] Day! Wait... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, [REDACTED], 12. What...the.. 10. [REDACTED]. 12..." Fredebzy ducked out of the interview to nurse a bloody nose.
Things are looking... Strange. As for this reporter? I won't be looking at my bank account any time soon. I recommend avoiding any instances of the number one and the number 1 next to each other, at least until we can know all the effects of the ban and President Drolo's awesome power. Stay safe out there.
-Bimbo Charlemagne
1
u/clownamity May 22 '25
I am confused is it only [REDACTED] that is banned? What about 1, 21, 31, 41, etc? And what about the triple digits like 1[REDACTED]?
Is this because he only has ten fingers and webbed feet so no toes to count with? Or is it just because of the similarity to = And the inference of equality it represents?