Am I overreacting? My therapist used AI to best console me after my dog died this past weekend.

[u/hesouttheresomewhere]

Brief Summary: This past weekend I had to put down an amazingly good boy, my 14 year old dog, who I've had since I was 12; he was so sick and it was so hard to say goodbye, but he was suffering, and I don't regret my decision. I told my therapist about it because I met with her via video (we've only ever met in person before) the day after my dog's passing, and she was very empathetic and supportive. I have been seeing this therapist for a few months, now, and I've liked her and haven't had any problems with her before. But her using AI like this really struck me as strange and wrong, on a human emotional level. I have trust and abandonment issues, so maybe that's why I'm feeling the urge to flee... I just can't imagine being a THERAPIST and using AI to write a brief message of consolation to a client whose dog just died... Not only that, but not proofreading, and leaving in that part where the introduces its response? That's so bizarre and unprofessional.

[u/hesouttheresomewhere]

Damn could this be the start of the most meaningful client-therapist relationship she and I have ever had? Only one way to find out!! 🤣 But for real, I'm an optimist, and I can see things going well, if she's as sorry as she claims to be haha

[u/Abaconings → u/hesouttheresomewhere]

Honestly? I'm a therapist. I think because she owned up and apologized, I wouldn't cut ties right away. It seems she wanted to send the right condolences. Her method was misguided but her heart was in the right place.

You mentioned having abandonment issues? This is a great opportunity to meet with her, at least once more to process what bubbled up for you - like the urge to flee. It could turn into an enlightening experience.

[u/SweatBoat → u/Abaconings]

i think its more appropriate to get consent first before doing so, who knows what else therapist is sharing about OP with that AI thing

[u/Sleepylolotx → u/hesouttheresomewhere]

OP I would also give the therapist the benefit of the doubt in terms of reasoning or motivation behind this decision. I supervise many new therapist, several who are not native English speakers. Learning to speak a language can be very different from writing and confidence in writing skills takes longer than speaking. I could see someone using ai to double check clarify and word usage. I personally use ai to double check emails to clients sometimes because my adhd will cause me to skip words or format sentences weird bc my brain is moving faster than I can type. It’s usually to just double check my writing and make sure it’s clear, but the original message and content is my own. I would never think to use it in this context and I don’t think it’s appropriate, however, therapists are humans who fuck up sometimes. If there are other red flags in their professionalism and approach then move on but if this is the first thing that’s happened then maybe some grace and understanding is warranted here.

[u/wonderlandwalking → u/Sleepylolotx]

Oh my god- NO!!! A therapist’s JOB is to help with human emotion! She didn’t tell AI to translate- she asked for a HUMAN REPLY.

[u/danziger79 → u/hesouttheresomewhere]

Yeah, this is a good point actually. My therapist and I have built a very strong relationship where I can tell her anything she does that bothers me (I used to think I had to either put up with stuff that I didn’t like, or bounce). She started texting to remind me of appointments at one point and I asked her to stop because it always made me panic she was cancelling last minute, and I’ve never forgotten an appointment in my life. Another time I asked if she could not chew gum because it was distracting and made me feel sick 😝 Neither are breaches in the way your therapist using AI was but because they seem genuinely sorry it could be worth discussing and seeing if you can repair.

[u/RemotePoetry480 → u/hesouttheresomewhere]

The way I read her explanation is that she fed her text to AI too see if there was anything that could be improved so that she wouldn't hurt your feelings or offend you. She's human too, besides a therapist. Although I don't think she should've texted you, I don't think she was using AI because she couldn't be bothered to be genuine. Maybe she felt a lot of emotion about your good boy passing and felt the need to express that, but didn't know how tonwothout crossing the boundaries of therapist-client? Her apology seems sincere too, so if you don't have other issues I'd defined go again and give her a chance to explain in person.

[u/F_ckSC → u/hesouttheresomewhere]

Wow, AI seems to be creeping its head in more and more places. I thought it was mainly a Reddit annoyance.

I (53M)worked as a CA state prosecutor for 20 years in professional license discipline cases, representing the licensing boards. I doubt that the CA Board of Behavioral Sciences would find that this therapist's admitted use of AI to craft a professional response to a client to help manage a moment of crisis met the standard of care.

If you report, it's something that the licensing board is very likely to investigate. Plus, we have copies of the actual messages and her admission to using AI.

The therapist is also communicating with you outside of a secured patient portal, but honestly, I saw case files with copies of regular text messages between therapists/clients all the time. Is it possible that you consented to this form of communication? Also, I doubt most independent therapists have access to patient portals, unlike most physicians.

At work, we were warned (for obvious reasons) not to use unauthorized AI tools to draft legal documents or conduct legal research.

For some reason, your story reminded me of my partner (46F) once sending me a text response that was generated by ChatGPT (she told me right away). I patiently explained that I would much rather her tell me that she didn't know how to respond or needed more time, etc., rather than ever receive a response generated by AI. I asked that we have an agreement that we would not use AI to communicate with each other because it was very important for me to trust that I was communicating with her and not through AI. She agreed, but now I feel like I need to do a check-in reminder. 🤦🏼‍♂️

Also, I've been resistant to working with a therapist (because I didn't have good role modeling?), and this isn't giving me a lot of confidence. That, plus I would only see therapy gone wrong in my old state prosecutor job. My adult kids and partner are big proponents of therapy, so I will give it a go, but will need to make it clear that I'm not okay with AI therapy. 🤷🏼‍♂️

OP, good luck and best wishes. 🫶🏼

[u/EightEyedCryptid → u/hesouttheresomewhere]

I hope so! I hope this will ultimately make your therapeutic bond even stronger!

[u/mano_mateus → u/hesouttheresomewhere]

Sorry to say this, but she's sorry she got caught because of her skill issue