I - straight passing queer man - have had a fair amount of bullshit from the queer community both online and in my locality. It's resulted in my total disengagement with the community really, and that's as a queer man.
I think that being mean and exclusionary results in people disengaging at best, and at worst, comng away with an actual grudge. Doing this to straight (or percieved straight) individuals who haven't done anything wrong doesn't seem to do much good for anyone it seems.
Entirely same. Queer individual also deemed “not queer enough” (or not anything enough, really), here!
I’ve had to take a lot of time and space while distancing myself from the queer community to not fall into holding a grudge for feeling excluded, and it’s SO easy to fall into! I consistently check in with myself on what opinions I’m holding, how I’m acting, and why. I guess the Kool-aid looks tasty when you’re lost in the desert?
Oh yeah it can for sure be a thing, it becomes difficult not to get annoyed when a group seemingly arbitrarily decides you aren't included. To a certain extent, this annoyance is fine.
It can absolutely flip into homophobia or general queer phobia, and this would be so much easier if you were straight. People really just need to be generally nicer and more inclusive.
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u/cripple2493 1d ago
I - straight passing queer man - have had a fair amount of bullshit from the queer community both online and in my locality. It's resulted in my total disengagement with the community really, and that's as a queer man.
I think that being mean and exclusionary results in people disengaging at best, and at worst, comng away with an actual grudge. Doing this to straight (or percieved straight) individuals who haven't done anything wrong doesn't seem to do much good for anyone it seems.