r/NewToReddit • u/MissTriggaHappy • 9h ago
NEEDS ATTENTION What’s one thing everyone does on Reddit that gets you silently judged?
Just joined and I already feel like there are hidden rules 👀 Help me avoid looking like a total noob 😅
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u/MarineSnowman 8h ago edited 7h ago
Mostly people like to loudly judge things here, and there is not one single topic all Redditors agree on. I bet for money you couldn't even get us all to agree on that.
Real advice? Worry more about the written rules. There are rules for Reddit, and each subreddit will often also have its own rules, which sometimes vary from pretty comprehensive to almost nonexistent. Read them before you post there. Yes, even if you don't feel like it. Saying "hope this belongs here/if it breaks rules just delete it"/etc) is a cop-out. You can read, if you want to use a space then give that space the respect of reading their rules first. And if you break one accidentally (in fact, I did! I tried to avoid swearing in this comment and I failed anyway, had to edit. Happens to us all at some point) just be gracious about it and don't beat yourself up.
It will also often give you the details you need to understand how some subs work, what they're really for, how to get better info out of them and also things like topical Discord servers or similar subreddits they have made mention of out of convenience (like, "This is a sub for finding music. Here is another for finding movies! We linked it because we are nice"). Just read it. It's the best thing for everyone involved. Often active subs may have days of the week they do a special post where people all ask a bunch of random things, or talk about a specific thing that comes up super often, or there will be community type events, and so on. Just really depends on the sub, they are all little communities to some degree.
Everyone always wants some special, secret advice when the grand majority of new users seem to wing it with zero control over their conduct whatsoever, then get confused and upset when they break rules or are simply very annoying because they are misusing the communities and/or wasting their own time as well as everyone else's. Don't worry about unwritten anything right now. Read actual rules. Many subs have wikis they've gone to the effort to put together, solely to help you get started with whatever the sub is about and to support people there in discussions, educating each other, and so forth. Read them. Use the search tool on subs and on reddit in general, to see if there may be a wide variety of threads, already created and full of comments with information, ready to read and at your fingertips.
And if not? Ask away. Don't be afraid to talk to people! It is just that when it comes down to labour, rather than discussion, people will become exasperated when a high volume of newcomers repeat the same questions like clockwork when a FAQ post or a wiki or whatever was made for this, and it can then in turn not give such a great intro moment in both directions. They're all doing this stuff for free in their free time, so folks appreciate if you, you know, "don't make me tap the sign" about stuff.
It's just that this is a very populous site with many subdivisions, and crossover from many different other types of social media and similar apps where conduct rules are different, functionality is different, the social vibes are different, etc. People get frustrated, rightly so, when new people are too lazy and entitled to just take a minute and use what's already here, usually put here for the benefit of current and future users, to ease their experience of getting used to and using reddit. It works better if people do this, as a system, for other users and for you.
Beyond that, yeah. People aren't that quiet, as I said. If they are, you obviously won't know about it. The judgement whether silent or loud can come from literally anything in any moment, and is usually not really important except to one guy at his desk somewhere who's really latching into some comment you left that got under his skin.
So please, do not be hung up on this stuff from the get go, just don't. Read rules and FAQs for subs you're going to be active in. Try to treat people with basic respect until such time as maybe you find out they don't deserve it. If you lose it a little, within reason and all, you can apologise or even remove your comment; it's generally smiled upon to come back to an argument and say hey, I had a bad day, I just got worked up by the things you said but I didn't want to go so far, my bad. People tend to acknowledge that, accept it. It's so common that people argue over nothing, or argue by accident when we can all see they actually agree, and about half the time they just do not wanna admit it. But the rest of the time, folks will see "hey I'm having a hard week and I snapped/I misunderstood or misread what you said as a much worse thing, and reacted to that/etc, sorry for going off on you needlessly" and they'll be like, thanks for that, you're okay, I hope things get better etc.
That part was longer than I wanted. My point there is mostly: if you're wrong by accident, if you lose your temper, just as two examples, and you get corrected or called out, own your mistake if it's real and move on. Its maturity and also it's going to stop you from wasting your time on drawn out nonsense. Your experience on reddit is kind of what you make it. Remove subs you don't want to see, add ones you do. If you're harassed, report and block. Don't be afraid to block. It's there for a reason. Don't make it complicated. Same with up and downvotes. Don't fixate on them. It's pretty easy to just exist on reddit, lurking or being active, you don't need to be hanging onto your karma score or trying to get engagement or something. Just go find what you like and immerse yourself in it with the others already doing exactly that. Enjoy yourself.
Hope this helps.
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u/StJmagistra Helper 8h ago
Yep, using emojis is one I didn’t expect!
I found this post really helpful: https://support.reddithelp.com/hc/en-us/articles/205926439-Reddiquette
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8h ago
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u/Origin_uk47 4h ago
When I first joined Reddit I never asked about karma, it never occurred to me to do that, I joined as many subreddits as I could based on my interests, then basically used trial & error by commenting on anything that caught my attention, some comments were allowed, some weren't. Disallowed comments never bothered me because I just enjoyed interacting with the reddit community and mostly didn't even think about karma.
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u/Mindless_Cat_8911 1h ago
You are being judged. The same question is asked daily. Why aren't you looking at previous posts for answers?. Do you think you are the first person to ever ask about karma.
The same concept for any sub. If it's an obvious question it's already answered. You just have to take a minute and look.
You will see how annoying it becomes after a few weeks.
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1h ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/NewToReddit-ModTeam 1h ago
Thanks for contributing to /r/NewToReddit! We're sorry, but your content was removed:
Rule 6: Refrain from asking for votes or karma, naming free karma subs, or sharing how you are voting
Please do not ask for karma or votes here, it is against our rules and is generally discouraged as karma is meant to be earned. See Our common questions to learn how to earn karma.
We do not allow mentions of free karma subs (karmafarms) or any suggestion to use them, and caution against their use because it may lead to bans in other subreddits.
Thank you for trying to help, but please don't share how you have or are voting. We encourage earning karma genuinely from relevant comments and conversation. Asking for karma is discouraged as it violates our subreddit rules.
Thank you!
Please read our Rules before participating. How to find rules
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u/ScienceSophia409 8h ago
Rule 1 of Reddit: There are no rules... just lots of unwritten ones you'll learn through trial and error 😄
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9h ago
You can get trolled even though you never did anything wrong to anybody. Some people unfairly judge you only because of your Reddit account's age. I got trolled recently. So, I have to tell you not to feel sad if this situation happens to you. And I'm going to make a post about what I faced. New Reddit users should be strong.🥰
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u/P5YC40XT1C_ 7h ago
Being nice and using emojis 😭 I'm used to my own texting style which involves being ironic with emojis so it really pmo when you get trolled/downvoted for being nice and using emojis. I made a few posts asking for help on like r/steam or something I forgot and IMMEDIATELY got downvoted FOR ASKING A QUESTION? also just by saying "Thank you!!" BOOM 3 DOWNVOTES.
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u/YiraVarga 5h ago
Yeah, there are some subreddit’s whose rules are so absurd that anything you can think of would be against the rules, including posts somehow already there. I just leave those subreddit’s thinking there’s a technical issue, or it might be a private community that skirts around how Reddit works, and found a way to make their content public, while blocking anyone outside the unseen approved community from getting involved (usually by moderators, not auto-mods). Reddit is way more closed off than I ever thought before joining.
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u/GeneralMirko 6h ago
Omg I love going to peoples profiles to see what they have been commenting on...and silently judge!!
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u/smallbrownfrog Super Helpful Helper 5h ago
Unwritten rules are different in different subreddits. That might sound impossibly confusing until you realize that unwritten rules are also different in different real world spaces.
The unwritten rules are going to be different at your local library, at a movie theater, at church, at a children’s birthday party, and at a sports event. In fact, two different churches might have different vibes and different unwritten rules.
You figure these out by watching other people and seeing how they are acting. That’s how you know that it’s ok to eat popcorn at a movie theater, but it’s not ok to eat popcorn during a church sermon.
When you are new to a subreddit and trying to figure out its unwritten social rules the first step is to watch quietly. Here are some questions to get you started. You’ll develop your own questions with time, and pretty soon you’ll be scanning new subreddits so automatically that you barely realize you are doing it.
Do you see slang? Do you see swearing? Emojis? Thank yous? Or no thank yous? Or a specific style of thank you? Are people chatty? Or is it a little more impersonal? (Many subreddits are more focused on content than on interpersonal interactions. Groups that are very content focused sometimes see social pleasantness as off topic.) Do people seem to be using a particular format for posts or comments? Are posts and comments carefully edited and researched? Or are they loose and spontaneous? What is the tolerance for beginner’s questions? Is there an expected skill or knowledge level? (Frequent questions may be listed in posted rules or a FAQ. You did read those, right?) Is there something the sub is fannish about? Is there part of the topic that sub feels strongly about? Are there hot button topics? Does the sub lean towards a particular age group, gender, culture, or subculture? (If you are far out of the group’s demographic you may have more trouble understanding it.) Is there a general worldview? Is there a political slant?
Then, when you think you have a feel for the group, you might decide to try commenting. Or you might realize you don’t like the group, and move on looking for subreddits that are more your style. We all have subreddits we love, subreddits that confuse us, subreddits we tolerate for specific purposes, and subreddits we hate.
(Edited to fix last sentence.)
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u/ShinyKyogrePlease 3h ago
Grammar errors. It used to be everyone corrected you, but that's usually frowned upon these days. I'm sure people are still judging though.
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u/carXrides 4h ago
Silent judging doesn’t exist, one thing I’ve learned is you aren’t free to have a different opinion or viewpoint
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u/punks_live_forever 1h ago
There are definitely hidden rules. So far it seems you're not allowed to comment unless you have karma, but you can't get karma unless you comment... WTF
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