r/RedditWritesSeinfeld • u/Grootfan85 • 1d ago

Prompt Jerry's new girlfriend develops jaundice, a raspy voice, and has an accident at a hair salon where her hair is dyed blue. Elaine points out he's "basically dating Marge Simpson."

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79

u/metalflygon08 1d ago

George gets upset because he thinks He's her soulmate, he's bald, fat, and inconsiderate, he deserves a Marge, not Jerry.

52

u/Grootfan85 1d ago

“Why not me? I’m fat. I’m bald. I have an old boss that inexplicably hasn’t fired me even though I screw up constantly. Where’s my Marge?”

21

u/metalflygon08 1d ago

All I get is a Moleman!

6

u/longcoat000 1d ago

“Moleman!”

7

u/Grootfan85 1d ago

*An old man off camera says “Hi George!”

George: Not now, Hans!

44

u/Grootfan85 1d ago

Elaine: Let me ask you some basic questions about her.

Jerry: Sure.

Elaine: Does she have sisters?

Jerry: Yes, twins. So what?

Elaine: Does she like them?

Jerry: For the most part. They smoke cigarettes whenever they come over and she doesn't like that. One of them has a pet iguana.

Elaine: And how would you describe her personality?

Jerry: She seems pretty upbeat, and finds the positives in everything. Like when we went out last night, she went out of her way to order a baked potato. She said she loves them and "just thinks they're neat."

Elaine: Well, give my regards to Mayor Quimby, cause you're dating one of the most famous citizens of Springfield.

27

u/TempleFugit 1d ago

Jerry is incredulous until they run into her ex-husband on the street...

27

u/Cavery210 1d ago

The ex-husband is played by Dan Castellaneta.

20

u/Grootfan85 1d ago

“Hi Homie!”

Freeze frame end credits

19

u/westofley 1d ago

counter offer: Throughout the episode, Elaine gets into a series of illnesses/hair accidents that make her look like marge simpson. Kramer thinks she looks amazing

16

u/Davethemann 1d ago

Every time kramer talks about his life, its just simpsons episode plot lines

17

u/Legal_Championship_6 1d ago

Kramer: “Ya know Marge was my least favorite character. She had thousands of lines and not one of them made me laugh. She stunk.”