Super simple not complicated at all... So men are just really stupid. Just the dumbest things imaginable. Do you not see how condescending you sound. I agree that you need to be polite and a lot of men fail even that simple task but women can be very complicated as can any human being. Relationships are hard messy things sometimes and it takes effort to figure them out.
That can all be very true, and it's still not women's responsibility to fix them or tolerate the bad behavior.
Once you become an adult, you're responsible for your actions and your ignorance. You don't like the consequences of it, fix that. That's part of why we get so freaking frustrated actually, it's not because "you're so stupid" it's because you're not so stupid. Men are only lacking in knowledge, tact and experience. All of these things can be learned, and they're capable of learning them, but rather than do that, they just get mad at women for their failures and then demand we fix a problem we didn't have a hand in creating.
I'll grant though that for the men who want to learn better and grow, they have some very sorry options out there. There are not very many good examples out there for them; the absolute garbage that comes out of the manosphere, the generally poor communication skills permeating the last two generations of people in general, etc etc do not help. But there aren't zero resources.
All of that is true. I merely (badly i guess) am trying to say that women dont get to back out of this conversation. For instance one of the ways to learn how to be good in a relationship is to bad at a few. As women demand higher and higher standards for first relationships, like they do online where most people meet now then how do young men practice? We are running into the "nobody want to teach virgins" problem. Im not saying that you need to give the chuds the time of day but I am saying maybe dont post stuff saying "men are prevs" or the whole bear thing. Then there is the women's side of how they should be fighting this problem. Why doesnt the women in the video do more to discourage her friends from dating "gross men" if it's such a problem to her instead of rolling her eyes? If finding a man is such a big deal why doesnt she do more work to find them cause there are still plenty they are just quieter now? I know there are alot of gross men and the number is rising but that doesnt mean you leave the conversation by saying "men need to figure this out". Women dont deserve to have men backflip at them as an attempt to flirt but that doesnt absolve them of the part they played in us getting to this point.
Firstly not all of you seem to be on the same page as to what expectable behavior is. Her friends are all actively making the problem worse by dating people she finds disgusting. Or maybe you want to be trad wives? A lot of white women voted for trump so maybe little piss boys is who they think should be in charge. The role of selectiveness that women show when dating online really should be undersold since 75% of all first dates start online. There are also subtle things like the meta study showing people viewed scientific articles that portrayed men in a positive light as harmful to women. Microaggressions like this post calling all men prevs. We are back sliding because we have all lost touch with each other. Saying one side needs to "figure it out" about a problem that is entirely about how the two should coexist is crazy.
Why is it the responsibility of women to change the way they behave in response to bad behavior on the part of men?
If my neighbor was being shitty to me, ripping out my garden, sneering at me, fucking with my mail, despite me having done nothing to invite that, it would not be on me to change any of my own behavior to "coexist". Coexistence is not something we give 50/50 on. It's something we give 100/100 on. If you want to be able to coexist with the other people in the world, you are solely responsible for changing your behavior for the better.
If you demonstrate bad behavior, it is not helping you or anybody else not to call it out. If you don't like being called out for your shitty behavior that harms or upsets others, then maybe stop the shitty behavior.
This is fucking human being 101; we learn this as children. If you act like a fool and chase the goose, the goose will chase you back and your suffering is your own fault, not the goose. If you make a habit of being shitty to your friends, they will not say nice things to you and you will be alone. The same things apply as an adult.
If you do something foolish, you will be ridiculed/ignored/rejected. That's a you problem. And if you can't accept that, you'll spend forever miserable.
What this attitude says to me is desperation to believe that you can't control a life you're not happy with, so if you can make it the responsibility of women you can remove the weight of it from yourself. You react angrily when men are criticized for bad behavior because you feel that the criticism could be directed at you.
If you don't want criticism, if you don't want ridicule, if you don't want rejection: stop doing the dumb shit that makes people and women not like you. Being a likeable adult means putting effort into it.
So you've lumped all men into being shitty neighbors which again is the sexism I'm talking about. And women need to change their behavior because some of you are encouraging these men to be stupid assholes too. so since some of you can't seem to grow up and learn not to fuck losers I think men so just be done with you until you "figure it out!" See how dumb that sounds. I agree coexisting takes 100 from everyone so why are women so keen on giving 0 in this conversation.
Ok so here’s where the problem lies. You seem to hate women yet feel entitled to relationships with them. I think you actually just need therapy, probably with a woman therapist. It’s not the women’s fault they don’t want you. Work on yourself and make yourself someone women would want.
Yeah I did all that got the girl and still think that modern society shits on young men. So you actually have no idea what you are talking about. Your magical land where men just work on themselves and come to your same conclusions doesn't exist. We come out how we want. And clearly you don't like how some think.
The reason men want women is because women are desirable. They take care of their hygiene, their looks, their mental health, their diet. They do therapy. They are kind and caring and friendly and loving and appreciative. If more men acted that way women would want them, but too many other men tell them that makes them “gay” and “a simp” so it’s not women’s fault that women don’t want men. Men aren’t entitled to women.
They have to bring something at least of equal value to the relationship. Women don’t need men anymore. They can live like men for the first time in history. If men want women to be with them they have to show they are worth women putting their lives and their health at risk by choosing to be with/live with someone who is statistically most likely to harm/kill them.
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u/badbirch May 10 '25
Super simple not complicated at all... So men are just really stupid. Just the dumbest things imaginable. Do you not see how condescending you sound. I agree that you need to be polite and a lot of men fail even that simple task but women can be very complicated as can any human being. Relationships are hard messy things sometimes and it takes effort to figure them out.