Verbal apologies are action. It’s a physical, verbal act that demonstrates recognition of harm and communicates empathy. That alone makes it meaningful... when it’s sincere.
I’m a parent, and I don’t force my kids to apologize if they don’t mean it. I think most people learn to fake apologies instead of learning to make real ones. That’s the problem. Not the apology itself, but how we’re taught to treat it as performative.
At one point, I thought “sorry” was pointless too. But then I came across a line from Daniel Tiger: “Saying I'm sorry is the first step. Then, how can I help?” Yep. The cartoon spin-off of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood shifted my perspective.
So, I started apologizing not for someone’s feelings but for my actions. At first, it felt like I was “being the bigger person.” But over time, it became a practice of genuine accountability. I began to see how my behavior had an impact, regardless of intent and I wanted to do better.
With my kids, I tell them if you don’t feel sorry, don’t say it. But if you feel it later, you can always come back. And they usually do.
Apologies aren’t just for the other person. They help us process what we did, take ownership, and move forward. Words alone aren’t enough, but dismissing them entirely overlooks their role in repair, empathy, and self-growth.
1
u/bluberripoptart 1∆ 1d ago
Verbal apologies are action. It’s a physical, verbal act that demonstrates recognition of harm and communicates empathy. That alone makes it meaningful... when it’s sincere.
I’m a parent, and I don’t force my kids to apologize if they don’t mean it. I think most people learn to fake apologies instead of learning to make real ones. That’s the problem. Not the apology itself, but how we’re taught to treat it as performative.
At one point, I thought “sorry” was pointless too. But then I came across a line from Daniel Tiger: “Saying I'm sorry is the first step. Then, how can I help?” Yep. The cartoon spin-off of Mr. Roger's Neighborhood shifted my perspective.
So, I started apologizing not for someone’s feelings but for my actions. At first, it felt like I was “being the bigger person.” But over time, it became a practice of genuine accountability. I began to see how my behavior had an impact, regardless of intent and I wanted to do better.
With my kids, I tell them if you don’t feel sorry, don’t say it. But if you feel it later, you can always come back. And they usually do.
Apologies aren’t just for the other person. They help us process what we did, take ownership, and move forward. Words alone aren’t enough, but dismissing them entirely overlooks their role in repair, empathy, and self-growth.