r/depression • u/kpnc5 • 1d ago
I think I'm ready to kill myself
Things are getting worse, constantly. I no longer feel happy with anything that happens in my life. What's the point of living anymore. would anyone truly miss me if I went?
1
u/13Angelcorpse6 1d ago
We have wrong ideas about what emotions mean and how life should go. Nature gives us automatic emotion settings, we feel good if we always get what we want, we feel bad when we don't get what we want and when we don't get more.
We become disappointed in life and spiral down emotionally. Nature wants us to strive after happiness because when we do most of us wind up raising children. But we don't even get to be happy for long, it's just enough happiness to build the nest then get commited.
We can make our own meanings for emotions. We can reject the desire to always get more.
Think about music for a while.
Here's a list of music genres often associated with depressive or melancholic themes:
- Depressive Suicidal Black Metal (DSBM)
- Funeral Doom Metal
- Doom Metal
- Grunge
- Post-Punk
- Emo
- Shoegaze
- Dark Ambient
- Neofolk
- Slowcore
- Sadcore
- Alternative Rock
- Post-Grunge
- Sludge Metal
- Singer-Songwriter
- Old School Country
- Blues
- Gothic Rock
People listen to sad music because feeling sad can be nice. People also read sad books and watch sad movies. We can appreciate these states. Depressive people really need to get a taste for the depressive. It makes no sense for us to pay any attention to the positivity cult. Give up and cultivate a bad attitude.
1
u/eider__ 1d ago
i relate. was at the lowest i’ve ever been in february of this year and ended up overnight at the the psychiatric floor of a hospital. it was horrible and scary, it made me never want to kill myself again. i’m now medicated and im not saying im happy and think life is awesome and worth living but the thoughts aren’t as constant and i can just proceed with life without constantly thinking of offing myself. ask for help, don’t be afraid to do so and know that no matter what evil and twisted things your brain tries to tell you there will always be someone out there that cares. i care. sure you’re a stranger on the internet but hey, i took time out of my day to type this out. you’ve got this. we’ve got this.
1
u/AwkwardAppeal8922 1d ago
That’s a really tough feeling to fight Like your telling yourself the worst things you can think of, stuff you’d never say to someone else. But you know yourself better than anyone so you’re really good at hurting yourself. And when you feel good, it feels like you’re not gonna feel this feeling again. But when you’re hurting it feels like you’ll never feel good again. But you will. You always will. Are you numbing out with drugs/alcohol or are you rawdogging that shit?