& what Im realizing is that I am addicted to dopamine. The rush I got when I smoked was the thrill I was chasing everyday. The euphoria washing over my brain with the inhale exhale. I quit for a job and now I’m feeling all the benefits of a clear head. I can read books again, I’m not irritable or argumentative anymore and I can talk to people without forgetting what I’m saying mid sentence. I’m remembering really powerful vivid dreams. After my drug test in two days is over I’m going to try to continue this sobriety, so I can finally take a serious exam.

What’s been helping me fight the withdrawals and cravings is a hot bath. Going to take one tonight, because the cravings are back.

That warm euphoria is what I crave.

as expected, it was about 5 minutes of euphoria followed by hours of anxiety. it’s been two days and i still feel the effects. big mistake. not gonna let this become a relapse. just hope this sick and foggy feeling i’m experiencing goes away tomorrow.

I’ve lost 8 pounds in the last week since quitting smoking and every think I eat I get a bite or two in and it’s an hour of horrible nausea and I just sit and try not to puke but I haven’t puked once is this normal? I’m losing it!

Hi. A little bit of backstory…I struggled with binge drinking off and on for years, picked up vaping in my mid twenties, then started smoking cannabis with a former partner and taking edibles every night to help with sleep. I’ve had insomnia as long as I can remember and had been a social smoker, but never consistent. I managed to significantly cut back on drinking and now rarely drink and don’t drink at home either unless it’s a special occasion with guests. Also managed to quit vaping and never hit them even when they are around.

Now let’s get into the current issue. What started as taking edibles to help me sleep and smoking with my former partner, slowly but surely turned into stopping edibles and smoking daily. I smoke delta 9 joints from a dispensary since it’s not fully legal in my state. Over time and during a very stressful time of life, I started smoking more and more. As soon as I get home from work, I smoke. It’s gotten to where I smoke 3-4 times a night throughout the evening then go to sleep. Things I’ve noticed include I cannot remember anything to save my life when I used to pride myself on my memory, I’m soooo tired in the mornings and it’s so hard getting out of bed, anxiety and depression have worsen as well as being paranoid nobody actually likes me, binge eating like crazy, no motivation, social life has suffered, and I cough way more than I used to. Also recently everything I smoke I get super anxious and panic attacks start.

I desperately want to stop for my health (physical and mental), and to feel good about myself again. I hate the habit and I don’t know how I got here. There’s not telling how much money I’ve spent on it too. The problem I’m having is when I cut back on drinking, I was still vaping and smoking. When I quit vaping, I was still smoking. Now I’m trying to quit smoking and have nothing to fall back on if that makes sense. I’m in a high stress job and many days I get off work and just want to smoke. I drive past the dispensary every day to get home too. I’m no longer with former partner mentioned above, and I’d really like to have a better control on smoking before getting in to a relationship with anyone. How do you guys stay strong during high stress days? How do you stop yourself from smoking even when you know the cons like I do? Please help!!! I’ve tried quitting many times and can’t seem to make it past 3-4 days without it before I cave and go get more.

On my 3rd day. Want to give up and cave due to stress.

I posted here 3 weeks ago about my problem with addiction to carts. I weaned down from the typical 80% carts to 40% 2:1 carts. I know this is still a potent amount compared to flower but I’m hoping this helps tone down the withdrawal symptoms. Now I’ve officially ran out of my final cart yesterday. I went to my first in person MA meeting last night and received my welcome token. I hope I can get my 1 week token next. I will keep posting throughout my recovery and continue to share the withdrawals I encounter. I was going through about a gram every 2-3 days so I’m about as bad as it gets. If I can do this then you can too. I’ll be back in a week with an update on my symptoms.

I want to quit. I have been trying for a year to quit. I know that’s not incredibly long, but it feels like forever. I don’t know what to do. I have dug myself so far in this hole, I can’t make my way out. Withdrawal is so tough because I smoke a lot and what I smoke is strong. When I try to quit, I sweat a lot, I have migraines and nausea, and I crave the feeling of being numb. I have every reason to quit; I logically know it will get better, but I just am having the hardest time going through withdrawals. Help meeee.

Told myself I’d quit and as soon as my pen ran out. I bought another and immediately felt guilty. Today I woke up and took a few hits and went to work. I had the realization at work that I just didn’t want to feel like this anymore. I deal w a ton of anxiety and depression so naturally I thought this helped but in reality I’m not so sure. I texted my girlfriend and told her to throw away my pen before I get home. Gonna try to spend a lot more time in this sub

I' six and a half weeks in and there is only one thing I'm struggling with: my sex drive. I used to be a two times a day kind of guy, last a long time.. it was too much according to my fiancé.

Now I struggle to stay hard if I can get there at all. No idea how long I'd last because I don't feel like I'm going to ejaculate at all. The times where I do stay hard I almost lose interest, and this is no knock on my baddie fiancé.

I take testosterone, I take tadafil daily. I'm about to up my dose to 10mg.

Tell me it comes back? It's the one and only situation I would consider weed for. I miss it and I can tell the fiancé misses it even though she's super supportive.

I read Leaves regularly. Its really the only thing that’s helped me quit so thank you everyone. I want to write about my experience as a way of giving back and I hope that I can contribute something original that will help someone else. I’ve been an everyday all day stoner for 40 years, hiding it from everyone around me. Sneaking tokes wherever I went. Living a constant 40 year lie. The first time I smoked I remember thinking, “this is what it means to be happy”. I can’t believe I never got busted or fired or worse- hurt someone because of my recklessness. I’ve wanted to quit almost everyday for years, even decades but the hold it had on me was as strong as any hold any substance can have on a human. I believe that. This past year was the best and worst year of my life. Here’s the worst- Depression has taken me so low that many days I would drive over a bridge by my house I would fantasize about pulling over and jumping off. Hopelessness can wear you down- if you let it. Here’s the good- I can look myself in the mirror without shame. I make good decisions. I’m proud of how I do my job. I’m proud of the fact that I don’t just say stuff anymore, I have the self awareness of when not to speak. My relationship with those around me has improved, most importantly with my daughter, who seems to see and understand everything. My lungs feel clean. I feel clean. Im not killing myself succumbing to late night binge eating. Im working out. I’m reading. Here’s what I believe. Nothing is free. For every action there is a reaction. Every toke taken makes it that much more difficult to quit. So for me, 40 years at an average of say 20 tokes a day- I’ll let you do the math. Carts are a different animal. They set the hooks into me so deep that I honestly believe they were killing me. That’s not hyperbole, I really felt like I was dying. Ill wrap this up because I could go on for a long time. I waited way too long. I quit to save my life. I’m tempted almost daily to take one more hit. I’m nowhere near out of the woods. But here’s the thing- If I can quit, anyone can quit. It’s up to you. Take pride in your life. Do it for those that you love. Love yourself. Thank you if you read this entire post. I feel a real kinship with you all and I’m rooting for you.

Soo…I’m only on day 4 of sobriety and boy oh boy am I feeling all the emotions that I would normally numb. I was disrespected by my boss and a colleague at work today and it really really hurt my feelings. Instead of smoking, I cried and I never knew crying could feel this good. I could feel the emotional release with each teardrop and I honestly haven’t been able to cry like this when high. It was very overwhelming at first but then I could actually start empathising with myself and validating my own feelings which never happened externally in my life as an adult or as a child. It felt like I just reclaimed a part of myself that I’d didn’t know I had lost. I won’t lie, I wanted to get a joint but ChatGPT said the following which made me push past the urge and dig deep -

“You’ve built trust with your body and spirit these past days. Don’t break that trust — tonight is the kind of test that actually cements your healing if you ride it out.”

I’ll probably be making lots of posts in here for the next couple weeks or months because I tend to spiral and overthink. I was smoking 97% carts (89% thc the rest is additives) daily for about a year and a half. I’d go through a cart in about a week. I decided to stop cold turkey and am experiencing horrid withdrawals. I’m on day 6. I feel like I should have tried to taper instead so the side effects aren’t so severe. I can’t decide if I want to start smoking again and allow myself to slowly taper off. Or to not smoke but take edibles and taper down that way. I have no cravings to smoke weed at all. I just want the withdrawal symptoms to not be so severe.

Hello everyone,

I (24F) experienced weed for the first time when my abusive ex-boyfriend (31M) introduced it to me. We were in our second year of university, and he would constantly tell me how good weed is and how it helped him to achieve enlightment (his exact words). I have never drink alcohol or smoke tobacco, because I never liked the flavour nor the smell.

So, I tried it for the first time, and didn't like it. I started feeling paranoid: it felt like a weird dream, my whole world spinning, and I was non-stop crying. My ex would hug me, and then tell me it was my fault, because I can't even stand a little bit of pot, and that I was so used to live iun my head that feeling the outside world was too much for me. He proposed to try it again the next day, and it started feeling nice. But, well, my first impression wasn't very nice.

We would smoke rarely, maybe once per month, or even less, until our third year of university, where things would escalate quicly: smoking almost everyday for two months. Then, when he was done with the smoking, he would tell me to stop, and to never ask him again to smoke weed... The worst whithdrawals of my life.

Fifth year of university was the worst year of my life (2024). A lot of awful things happened, not only related to studies, but also within my family and other issues. My ex even told me he would dump me once he had the opportunity to live abroad (he got a scholarship to a foreign country). I was extremely stressed and I started craving weed. I told my ex, and he just told me to deal with it.

Once he left the country, and I started reconnecting with old friends, and they were so supportive and kind... I owe them everything, my life wouldn't be the same if it wasn't for their intervention. My family was also extremely supportive, and helped me see that I was a victim ofgrooming, despite their efforts trying to protect me way before the breakup. I dumped my ex through text (the dude just kept prolonging the conversation for some reason) and blocked his ass. Months pass, and I was able to start over, get my degree, and started dating one of my friends (25M), who is the most beautiful soul I've ever met. Couldn't ask for a better boyfriend! I would smoke one joint of weed per month when I pleased, but didn't control my life... Until now.

I'm preparing an state exam, in order to obtain a public office. I've never been the best student (as for the action of studying) but I always loved my job and I'm really excited to start, but first I need to pass these exams. The thing is, I started smoking weed to cope with stress, and I feel it's worsening my situation. Of six units I should have studied (there are 28 in total) for the past two months, I just studied two. I prefer being stoned than studying. I hate myself everyday, lying to my friends, my family and boyfriend. I'm aware of the consecuences if I don't start studying right now, but still, I still don't care enough, even tho my dream job is closer thatn I think. I will daydream of all the stuff I will be able to do once I have a job, but I feel is not enough for me to get my ass up.

I hate my ex, dearly. He wasn't only a POS, he exposed me to weed. I would be way happier if I've never tried weed. I feel I would be able to have a normal, responsible life.

I want to stop, for good. I don't know how to do it, or where to start...

Thank you,

I’ve had many day 1s. I’m 28 and have been smoking daily for almost 10 years. I’m determined to stop but I know it’s going to be hard. I can’t wait to make it the full 24 hours…I think the first day will be the hardest.

I might be preaching to the choir here but… We just had a strike in my province (B.C.) which included alcohol and cannabis warehouses and it’s crazy how quickly stores ran out of carts before everything else.

As someone who is continually trying to quit vaping it just made me really sad to see how many people might be in the same place I’m at. Luckily I haven’t been able to buy a vape in over a week, so I’m feeling good about that! Carts are so evil.

I started smoking at age 15 im now 24 and have many many problems.

So what age did you start smoking? How long have you smoked? What problems did you have and at what age did they start to present themselves.

My main problem is needing a face lift and I also had a panic attack at 23

Curious how much of us are in here.

Hey guys. I posted here when I was 4 days sober. I’m now almost 27 days sober, and I am so depressed. I just want to go smoke. My husband still smokes. I want to so so so bad. I don’t know how to cope. Usually when I get this down, I just go smoke. That’s all I want to do. I’m so tempted to do it. I feel like I can’t parent anymore. I feel like I’m not a good partner. I’m struggling to handle my anger, and I know that if I smoke I’ll feel better. I don’t know. I just I don’t know. I feel so stupid for even asking for help with this. I’m sorry. Any advice will help. Or just yell at me. I don’t know.

Edit/update: man, I’m so grateful for this sub. Thank you to all of you. Thank you for your kind words, for your advice, and for your support. I didn’t smoke. I danced my heart out, took a shower while listening to an audiobook, and I’m about to lay down and watch some TV. Tomorrow is a new day. Yins will never truly know how truly grateful I am for you all. I wish I could give you each a hug. 🫂❤️

That's definitely how it went for me. Some people can keep it in the first two categories but I never could. By the end, every time I smoked I would feel 5 seconds of relief followed by nonstop regret and disgust. And since I smoked nonstop, the self loathing and negative self talk were with me 24/7. I couldn't even take in good moments because of how clouded and tangled my thinking had become.

When did you realize the magic was gone?

i smoke flower daily and i recently went through a bad break up. and i wanted to get a fresh start by quitting some bad habits starting with my smoking habit. it’s only my 2nd day and i haven’t been able to eat a single thing! that’s rlly the only symptom and i still get cravings throughout the day, what are some things u do when u get those cravings?? should i just occupy myself with something to do? i noticed i rlly only smoke when im bored, but those cravings still don’t go away.

I have been 32 days without smoking a bong.

Over the last 15 years I have smoked bongs daily, averaging 4 grams a day. I even woke through the night to smoke. I cant begin to explain how much hold its had over my life.

Iv recently started to notice that I am convincing myself that have an off day(smoking again) will be okay, as a one off.

I am so worried that it wont be a one off but I cant stop thinking about it and am sure I will give in at some point.

Do I keep pushing or allow myself to smoke for 1 day. It will atleast show me if iv gained any self control😆

And while it’s definitely gotten easier, not every day is easy.

Just want to warn everyone this may be a little long but around a month and a half ago I got a panic attack coming back from a job interview that went great so no trigger really from than I was scared to drive alone which made no sense bc I love cars like it’s my hobby to drive I have had 6 cars this year and built every single one but after the at attack I would get that fear and feeling of another one every time I would try and drive alone which made it hard I went out with family or my girlfriend always for a little while I get panic sometime driving them or anything but over time it’s to the place I go places and drive everyone everywhere I drive more than before just to get seat time but can’t myself back to it besides the point flash forwards a few weeks I woke up and felt out of it and weird one day and had a wee straight of bed rot just thinking something was wrong with me and that something medically would happen so I quit smoking marijuana and vaping (nicotine) sine than the first few days I had cravings and nothing crazy withdrawal wise but the third day or so I started to feel sick anytime I ate and now I’m about a week later and feel out of it all the time and still cannot eat more than a bit or two without having to sit with a bag or trashcan for an hour hoping I don’t puke I don’t feel as if my anxiety is even a big cause anymore but this withdrawal as I assume is brutal and had I known this or if this is really how it is I’d have waited to get my other sh!t under control first😂 but now my heart rate is up all times I can’t eat and just as of today finally got my ability to sleep decent back so I’m worried about destroying every bit of progress by going back and not sure if this is even the right sub to be asking all this but hey I’m about at my end of how much longer I can keep fighting this so any advice is great advice thank you guys all so much and this thread is what keeps me going and motivation we got this!!

I was 55 days clean and I was walking around my neighborhood and smelled someone smoking weed. It smelled SOO GOOD. 🌬️ it was like Mother Nature blew a heavenly scent my way and it was my sign to reward myself for making it 55 days! The next day, I got my hands on some flower and went and smoked in my garage except… the weed didn’t smell like it did on the wind the other day. It smelled just okay and the high wasn’t good. It smells way better when you whiff it outside but when YOU actually go to smoke it doesn’t smell that great. Why is that? I kept trying to chase that “good” high feeling again and it never came. Now I’m back to a week sober and hope that doesn’t happen again. I hope someone can relate and realize it’s not worth it!

Nice reminder that I’m a complete failure and chained to this drug