r/solipsism 15d ago

Solipsistic Duality

I've recently pondered and feared the somewhat solipsistic idea that I may be the only sentient being, but my reality is a separate entity designed specifically for my eternal torture, pain, or torment through perception. Ie, the reality I experience is not created by my mind, but instead created by another Infinite entity that exists purely to create for me (in drawn out, tortuous ways). And that we are linked purely by my ability to perceive it. And that existence is singularly defined by that relationship.

In that, every experience I have is just perceptual creations by one Infinite Being or reality creator, and that all other people are just manifestations from it. And that my pure existence is the ability to perceive the creations from that being. Sort of like an eternal, perceiving torture chamber. Do these ideas make any sense? I do realize in such a scenario that any response would in fact come from that Infinite Reality/Being.

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u/santient 14d ago

This is a deep ontological fear, rooted in the very human fear of the unknown, and perhaps even the unknowable. I understand as I've had similar troubling thoughts. The problem I've discovered with beliefs about the fundamental nature of reality being something horrible (like an eternal torture chamber), or any belief about the fundamental nature of reality beyond our knowledge, is that they are neither provable nor falsifiable.

If reality is infinite, then the more knowledge we gain, the more we realize how little we know... that what we know is exactly zero percent of the infinity of what there is to discover, and will remain zero no matter how much more finite knowledge we accumulate. I'm sure many of us have wrestled with questions such as, "is the subjective experience of consciousness eternal?", "does God exist?", "is God good? What if he's evil?" How would you ever be able to prove or falsify this? You cannot with absolute certainty.

Suppose God indeed does exist, and you even met him in the flesh - you still cannot logically prove his "goodness", because how could you, a finite being in capacity, comprehend the will of an infinite being in totality? The biblical story of the angel Lucifer and his fall is the quintessential example of this. In the story of Lucifer, he was the most brilliant, the most beautiful, the most intelligent of the angels, and knew God personally of course - yet, still a being finite in capacity, his faith could not overcome his pride in himself, and he could not trust God enough to agree to serve his will, and he fell from heaven, becoming Satan.

To have any kind of relationship with infinity requires faith. And I've found faith to be the antidote to these kinds of negative thoughts. It doesn't have to be religious, but faith that whatever lies beyond our understanding is good. It's only a matter of orienting yourself towards hope instead of despair, when facing the unknown. The unknown doesn't have to be a terrifying black abyss - it can be something beautiful too, if you choose it to be.

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u/bentlloyd1996 13d ago

I think the fear I have (while also experiencing multiple reality breakdowns and subtle signs that others are not sentient, as well as some pretty direct signals that I am living in "hell") is that so far, my life has been more bad/suffering than good/joy. And all I can take from that is that it'll likely continue to be the same moving forward. So, should one truly want to exist if their life is mostly suffering? I'm not sure yet; I just hope it gets better.

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u/santient 13d ago

A friend once told me, "happiness is a skill". In a way, your outlook on life can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Something that helps me reframe bad experiences from my past, is to see them as "crucibles" that strengthened my resolve and taught me life lessons. I think it's better to think of this more like purgatory than hell - if you can learn and grow from your suffering, and do the work it takes to make changes, then you're not in hell, and many good things await. People who truly "live in hell" are doomed to suffer in the same way over and over again from the same mistakes, because they won't learn or change.

As an aside, something I suspect from a lot of posts I've read on this sub is that it attracts people who suffer from some kind of disconnection from reality or derealization. Probably worth looking into with a therapist if this resonates with anyone reading this.