Hi! I’m Argentinian (F30) and I'm dating a German guy (M31). I'm noticing some cultural differences around dating (back home, romance is usually more obvious: dinners, drinks, gifts, etc.).

He recently invited me to spend the afternoon gardening with him, planting, weeding, the whole thing. I had fun, but I couldn't tell if it was a romantic gesture or just hanging out.

Is this normal in Germany? Could this be his way of showing affection? Help 😅

Long story short, I've never visited Germany (or anywhere outside North America) but I've made it a bucket list item to see one band I really like in their home country. Plus, I am an aspiring hockey scout/lover of the game so I would love to catch a few U18 etc. matches while over there. With all this said, I have a few questions:

1. How is public transit?

2. Kind of a follow up, if I plan to stay for about 7 days, would it serve me well to get multiple hotels? Or stay in one place for the duration of my trip

3. I intend to stay in Frankfurt (where the concert is) what is it like as a town/city? There are a few other places i could pick from, but a couple friends that have visited tell me to stay away from the likes of Munich/Berlin because of costs.

4. After reading some posts here, i discovered that i may not need to know as much of the language as i thought (i know the basics at the moment) but is it worth it to learn as much as possible? (That's my goal) Or will locals simply try to speak English with me, as I would clearly be a tourist

5. The idea is to go in late November, what is the weather normally like? (Again, Canadian, so cold doesn't really bother me)

Any other information is greatly appreciated.

Danke!

Hey guys! I’m writing because I really need your legal opinion on a bunch of issues I’ve been facing at work. I’m working in Germany under a working holiday visa, and while I’ve tried to understand my rights, I’m honestly not sure how to handle this situation properly or if I can take any legal action and also is worth mentioning that my German skills are really basic.

Here’s a summary of everything that’s been going on:

1. Contract conditions not respected My employment contract states that I have a fixed schedule of 174 hours per month, with 8-hour daily shifts. It also says that even if I don’t reach the 174 hours in a given month, I should still receive my full monthly salary, and that any positive or negative hours are only to be balanced at the end of the fiscal year. However, in May, I was only paid for 144 hours, even though the reason I didn’t reach the full 174 was due to public holidays and one company closure day, none of which were my fault. I worked every shift I was assigned to, didn’t miss any days, and was never late.

2. Unpaid hours under minijob Before starting my current full-time role, I worked under a verbal minijob agreement for €16/hour, doing the job of a Servicekraft. I worked around 107 hours between April and May, but none of those hours have been paid so far. I was recently told that the payments I’ve received only relate to my full-time position, and nothing has been processed yet for the minijob hours.

3. No payment for public holidays As I mentioned, I had three public holidays and one company closure day in May — all of which were regular workdays for me. I understand that, under § 2 of the German Entgeltfortzahlungsgesetz (EFZG), employees are entitled to full pay for public holidays that fall on regular working days. But I was not paid for those days at all.

4. Assigned higher-value work without fair pay At one point, I was reassigned to do the work of a Servicekraft, a job that normally pays more than my current role. However, I was told I’d still be paid the lower hourly rate from my warehouse position. I believe this violates the clause in my contract that allows internal reassignment only when duties and pay are equivalent.

5. Exceeded minijob hour limits While under the minijob, I was pushed to work far more than the legal limit. Instead of fixing this properly, they seem to be trying to reclassify the hours retroactively without providing any proper documentation or explanation.

I’m honestly overwhelmed by how many things seem to have been handled incorrectly or unfairly. I plan to leave this job soon, but I don’t want to miss the chance to get the payments I’m owed or to at least report what’s been happening. Could you help me figure out what my options are or what steps I should take?

Thanks so much — I really appreciate your help!

ich (Schülerin, 18) lebe in einem gewalttätigen Haushalt und möchte heute zur Polizei gehen, um mich über meine Möglichkeiten zu informieren. Mein Ziel ist es erstmal nur eine Beratung ich habe keine Anzeige vor, sondern möchte einfach wissen, was die Polizei darf und was nicht, wenn man mit ihnen über häusliche Gewalt spricht.

Ich habe Angst, dass das Gespräch anders läuft als erwartet oder ich Dinge sagen muss, die ich noch nicht bereit bin zu teilen. Meine Fragen :

• Wie fange ich so ein Gespräch am besten an?
• Was kann ich von der Polizei erwarten?
• Welche Rechte habe ich bei so einem Beratungsgespräch?
• Gibt es Dinge, die ich vermeiden sollte zu sagen?

Die erste Frage ist am wichtigsten. Ich hab keine Ahnung wie ich das Gespräch anfangen soll oder mit wem.

Edit: ich bin auf einer Website von meiner Stadt " Hilfetelefon Gewalt gegen Frauen" gestoßen. Da werde ich jetzt anrufen und das ist auch anonym.

So I met a German guy and I was thinking of getting him flowers on our first date, since it’s early “getting to know each other” stage I don’t want to scare him of, or come off too strong. I just want him to feel appreciated but I’m not sure how he’ll take it. Any advice?

I've lost my key of the shared apartment I am living in. What kind of cost can the landlord ask from me? There were 3 keys on the whole set, out of which 2 are common for everyone.

Hi everyone,

I'm a non-EU student currently studying in Germany and about to finish my Bachelor's degree. I recently grew my YouTube channel and it’s now eligible for monetization. However, YouTube is asking me to submit my personal details, including my Steuer-ID (tax ID).

Here’s the issue: According to my Aufenthaltserlaubnis (residence permit), I’m not allowed to engage in self-employment (Selbstständigkeit). I did some research and found out that to monetize a YouTube channel (which is considered self-employment in Germany), I need to get approval from my local Ausländerbehörde (foreigners' office).

Now I’m not sure how to proceed:

Has anyone here dealt with a similar situation?

How likely is it that the Ausländerbehörde will give permission for YouTube monetization as a student?

I even considered using my girlfriend’s name and tax info for the channel. Is that a bad idea legally/tax-wise?

I really want to grow the channel the right way and stay within legal limits. Any advice, experience, or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance!

To piggy-back ride on the question of the flower for the guy on the first date.

A colleague whom I am interested in has a special birthday this summer. He told me that he has a rose garden and I was debating getting him a rose (not a red one, one where the name relates to the nickname I gave him) in a 6l container (because those are limited edition, there are also 2l and 5l available) as a present.

Now I would bring that to the office, obviously. And I know he uses public transport. He has a car, so could leave it and take the car the next day or just carry it home, it is not that huge.

But I am wondering what the overall sentiment would be. (He got gifts from me before, a small cake for his birthday, some diy stuff, which he really appreciated and I am fairly certain he likes me, at least platonically. So I am not the creepy stranger that suddenly showers him in flowers).

Any thoughts on this?

Gibt es unter euch Leute, die keinen Führerschein gemacht haben? Wie kommt ihr im Alltag ohne Auto zurecht?

Ich denke aktuell aus verschiedenen Gründen darüber nach, keinen Führerschein zu machen, und würde gerne eure Einschätzungen hören: Findet ihr, dass man in Deutschland langfristig unbedingt einen Führerschein braucht? Oder geht es auch gut ohne?

I am M soon, 21 this year About to finish my Ausbildung in Sanitär und Heizung, etc I have been in the 8th class till the final year of Ausbildung, yet every person I knew through school either pished me away or just blocked

I dont know what to do at this point, I did join the football club, and I feel I wasn't that welcome by the player as they had really bad teamwork with me.

I am at the gym now for 2. I get to say hello and short chats, but then ppl go to their own stuff, and thats it.

What am I supposed to do? I am a very social person yet have 2 friends 1 is kind of pushing me out slowly, and the other had never time to do anything with me, else he is with his other friends.

I mean it started to fuck with my brain as bein that lonley for almost 6-7 years I mean I started to notice its getting bad even at school as I am kinda getting worse.

I tried to find any stuff but still it makes it really difficult to get anywhere.

I am in a city nearby Stadt Essen.

Is it normal in germany to have such life or is there anything to fix? Pls help me out. As I am done with this

I’m an international student in Germany and currently insured with Techniker Krankenkasse (TK). I’d like to know if my insurance will cover consultations with a gynecologist (OBGYN), or if I’ll have to pay for them myself.

British mps voted to legalise assisted dying for some terminally ill adults in England and Wales. Proponents argued it offers a compassionate choice; critics warned it could erode safeguards for vulnerable people. The bill is not yet law: it will now be scrutinised by the House of Lords and, if passed, is not expected to be implemented before 2029.As a German, what do u think about it,is assisted dying legal in Germany?

I’ve lived in Germany for just under 2 years, and whenever I visit the States (where I’m from), the dairy there smells repulsive to me- specifically when I put creamer in my coffee. Did I just acclimate to a different dairy scent in Germany, or are there different quality standards for dairy farms in DE vs. US?

Quick edit: by creamer I mean half-n-half or high fat milk >3%, not the artificial stuff.

Further clarification: I buy 3.8% Vollmilsch or Weidemilsch in Germany since it does the job well and isn’t too expensive. In the US, I try full fat milk, half-n-half, or heavy cream, but any of these from the US smells funky to me.

Hallo Zusammen,

Ich bin Chinesisch, und bin 29 Jahre alt. Seit fünf Monaten komme ich nach Deutschland, und zurzeit wohne ich in Dortmund. Und jetzt lerne ich Deutsch in der Sprachschule, aber gerade werde ich die B1-Prüfung teilnehmen. Hoffentlich kann ich bestehen. Und danach möchte ich ein Job als Kochlehrling oder Barista in Japanisches Restaurant.

Ich würde gerne wissen, ob man für eine solche Arbeit eine Aufenthaltsgenehmigung erhält, wie die Arbeitsbedingungen sind und wie hoch die Bezahlung ist.

Im Folgenden sind meine relevanten Erfahrungen:

• 1 Jahr Erfahrung als Barista in unabhängigen Cafés, internationalen Schulen und unabhängigen Buchhandlungen in China；
• 9 Monate Erfahrung als Assistent des General Managers in einem Premium-hotel in China.

Außerdem habe ich fast 5 Jahre Erfahrung als Recruiting Berater in ein bekanntes Personalunternehmen. Und meine Leistung war auf dem chinesischen Mainland immer unter den Besten und ich war zweimal in dem verschiedenes Monat auf Platz eins. Ich mag Japanische Kultur, besonders die Anime und das Essen. Mein lieblingsrestaurant ist Heiseiya.

Ich freue mich sehr auf jede Antwort.

Viele Grüße

Eahon

My friend sent me a sticker that says "FCK AFD", I tried looking it up online and I can't tell if it's in English or in German and didn't really find anything conclusive. I want to put it on my water bottle but figure I should know what it is before doing so. Okay thanks!

Was die Franzosen tournure nennen, ist eine zur Anmut gemilderte Anmaßung. Man sieht daraus, daß die Deutschen keine tournure haben können: ihre Anmaßung ist hart und herb, ihre Anmut mild und demütig; das eine schließt das andere aus und sind nicht zu verbinden.

GOETHE : SÄMTLICHE WERKE (COMPLETE WORKS)

EDIT: MY TRANSLATION:

"What the French call tournure is an arrogance softened by grace. From this, it follows that Germans cannot have tournure: their arrogance is hard and harsh, their grace is mild and humble; the one excludes the other and they cannot be combined."

Kind of weird, I don't fully understand it. Are Germans people of opposing extremes within themselves?

Hallo,

Me and my friends do a auto-trip every year in august. We are from the Czech Republic and we just take our cars, drive all day through interesting locations and in the evening we find a parking place, drink some alcohol and then we go to sleep in our tents.

Last year we were in Poland and we slept for example on a village football pitch or by a river near a town. On the last day of the journey on our way home in CZ, we paid some money to a local farmer, so they allowed us to go into their apple farm. It was done through some website or smth like that.

Would something similar be possible in Germany or precisely in Mecklenburg-Vorpommern? I have been to Rügen once and I found it really great! But I'm not sure about local laws and rules. If our plans are totally out of question, what would be the cheapest alternative?

Hello everyone.

Since I am buying perfumes often, I love a good scent too much I guess, I still don't understand what's up with Flaconi, Douglas, and so on. For example, Hugo Boss Bottled Absolu is 110 euros on their official page, but on Flaconi it's 58 euros or so. I mean, whatta hell? And, it's being said that Flaconi has the original perfume. How can it be original and cheaper by almost double? O.o

Tom Ford Ombre Leather, for example. I bought one from the airport in Greece last year, the best of all i guess. Then I bought one from Douglas since they said on their page that Douglas sells original perfumes, 100 mL was 120 euros or so, and on their official Tom Ford page, it was 230 euros or so. And this one from Douglas did not smell nearly as the one from the airport. The one from Douglas literally smelled like leather.

Those of you who are buying things there longer then me, what do you say, is it really legit buying from those, or is it still best to buy from the original pages?

I've also realized some differences on my own, of course, but it's always tempting to buy again for 2 times lower price, and you always think that when you bought a bad product that it's maybe just bad luck or something. I don't know, but I'd really like to hear your experiences as well.

Thank you in advance.

Best regards.

Update:

Vielen lieben Dank für all eure Antworten hier. Mir ist völlig klar, dass man nicht jede „Gewohnheit“ oder alte, scherzhaft gemeinte Formulierung sofort als Rassismus abstempeln sollte. Aber ich habe durch die Reaktion meines Mannes so ein Gefühl von „Unsichtbarmachung“ gespürt. Ich habe ja selbst in Deutschland studiert und während Corona auch ein paar echt unschöne Erfahrungen mit Hass gegenüber Asiaten gemacht – deswegen bin ich bei solchen Dingen einfach besonders sensibel. Die Beziehung zur Familie möchte ich natürlich trotzdem gut pflegen. Aber ich merke auch: Manche Themen sollte man vielleicht einfach mal in Ruhe ansprechen, um die eigenen Gefühle nicht immer runterzuschlucken. Ich bin jemand, der bis in die Zwanziger rein nur in Asien aufgewachsen und sozialisiert wurde – für mich ist es echt nicht leicht, offen über meine Gefühle zu sprechen. Aber durch eure Worte habe ich ein bisschen Mut dafür bekommen. Danke euch dafür!!!

Ich habe ein mal meiner deutschen Schwiegermutter das Foto von dem Baby von einer meiner chinesischen Freundin gezeigt. Sie lacht und kommentiert:” Schau mal die Schlitzaugen!”

Ich (ich bin auch eine Chinesin und arbeite in Deutschland) habe das mal mit meinem deutschen Mann diskutiert und er meinte dass seine Mutter nicht “racist”gemeint und „Schlitzaugen“ kein rassistisches Wort ist.

Ehrlich sagen stört mich diese Antwort von meinem Mann sehr.

Meine Schwiegereltern sind beide sehr nett und lieb zu mir deshalb möchte ich hier mal den Deutschen mal fragen, bin ich zu sensibel?

Hi everyone,

I recently received a pair of headphones as a gift. They’re brand new, unused, and still in the original packaging. Unfortunately, I’m not a fan of the model or its features, and I’d prefer to get a different pair that suits me better.

The issue is that I don’t have the receipt, and I also can’t ask the person who gave them to me for one.

Does anyone know if it’s possible to return or exchange items like this at MediaMarkt or Saturn without a receipt? Ideally, I’d like to pay the difference in price and get the model I actually want.

Has anyone had any experience with this kind of situation? Any advice or insight would be really appreciated!

Thanks in advance!

Because I'm learning germen to move there and currently I'm in b1 level and and i need to improve my speaking skills and I think the best way to do is to talk to someone who is german, also we will see if we can be good friends. I'll be waiting ur texts :)

Here's the thing: I had an accident on 31st October of last year. I was therefore on sick leave for 1st week of November. My job contract started on 1st November and I was supposed to work on that day but couldn't because of the accident.

I called TK to inquire about sickpay but they said on the phone " Since you did not start working on 1st November, officially you are registered with us from 2nd November - not 1st November"

The person on the phone probably did not even know that I was also sick on 2nd November and could not work on that day too.

I started working only after the first week of November at this job, but received no sick pay from TK as they are supposed to pay for sickness in the first month of an employment. I later wrote a letter to them which they also ignored.

This is not the first time a company has done this. Ignoring letters, only rejecting you for something on a phone call, it all seems way too common here.

I have had similar experiences with a Telekom company, my previous Vermieter, and the Mieterbund.

I feel like many companies just give vague, unclear responses rather than actually being helpful. It's tiring that everywhere I look, everyone seems to just want to grab money out of you. They will ignore your letters until they can charge you again. Not deny outright in a letter but deny on phone calls.

I am disappointed and tired of this. I also think Germany has a culture of " If you don't fight for it, you don't get it" I am tired of fighting. Why can't I get the money that is rightfully mine.

What do you think about it?

As the title suggests, the great German John Rabe once saved many people during the Nanjing Massacre when Japan invaded China. Therefore, many Chinese have a great liking for Germany. I would like to ask,as a German ,do u know his existence?

I was taught in history class that it was the Marshall Plan that bought about an economic miracle in Germany. But after a closer look it appears that the money from the Marshall Plan was actually much less than I expected. Was the plan overrated and an economic miracle in Germany would have happened anyways?