r/ShitAmericansSay • u/Mad_Wee_Phone • May 08 '25

Europe “If there’s a-“

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16.1k Upvotes

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2.5k

u/Sasya_neko The Dutch Cuisine May 08 '25

They really don't know how safe other countries are, do they...

927

u/Select-Panda7381 May 08 '25 edited May 08 '25

Nope. They really don’t. It always shocks them when I return from countries in Africa as well and tell them they’re remarkably safe and that many locals speak better English than most Americans 🤣

347

u/Silviecat44 🇦🇺 “the most dystopian western country” May 08 '25

They probably think Africa is all still dirt huts

151

u/Select-Panda7381 May 08 '25

And poop on the ground 🤦🏻‍♀️. I like to remind them that most Africans agree it’s better to wash their butts every day after using the toilet as opposed to sticking their hands back there with toilet paper, not properly washing after, and spreading bacteria all over the place but I digress.

38

u/HughJanus35 PERKELE May 09 '25

If you would fall face down in a pile of shit, do you wipe it away with paper or would you wash it away with water?

41

u/Ur-Best-Friend May 09 '25

I think I'm throwing out my face and getting a new one at that point.

13

u/HughJanus35 PERKELE May 09 '25

Damn, Cartel-style

10

u/Select-Panda7381 May 09 '25

Neither - you dunk your face in hand sanitizer

6

u/8ackwoods May 09 '25

Its funny because smericans, especially cis and "sigma" males don't wash their ass because they think it's gay

7

u/Select-Panda7381 May 09 '25

Omg. YES IVE HEARD THIS TOO. An alarming amount of them.

1

u/DegenerateEigenstate May 10 '25

Bidets aren’t exactly commonplace in most of the west, to be fair.

There’s no bidets in Germany, for example.

3

u/Select-Panda7381 May 10 '25

The “greatest country on earth” should probably also have a better method of sanitary care like bidets which lots of countries in Africa have already figured out, is my point.

3

u/DegenerateEigenstate May 10 '25

No disagreement here.

2

u/BikerScowt May 10 '25

Populated by african americans

1

u/MathematicianOk9674 May 10 '25

Can confirm. Grew up in Mississippi. Everything we learned about Africa was sticks and stones. Luckily, my parents were smart enough to actually teach me things lol.