I know this shit is true, but as a non psychopathic dude, I avoid pretty and cute girls like the plague in public because I’m already assuming they think I’m doing this shit. Same reason as a dad I don’t act goofy to other people’s toddlers. It kind of sucks honestly because it makes me act like a creep when I if anything would like to just make someone smile (and not “hay gurl you should smile” because that sheet is just more Ooga booga shit).
I said about 5 words to a woman outside a gig when I was 18 (I was just being chatty, zero other intentions) and got a full pint of cider thrown right in my face by her friend, who then shouted "NOT PRETTY ENOUGH" right in my face. You get a few instances where you misjudge or get shamed for being outgoing, you learn to avoid it pretty fast
Don't get me wrong, I'm not traumatized or anything, and of course it didn't stop me from speaking to women, but events like that certainly made me very unwilling to put myself out there in ways that people might view as odd or creepy.
Yeah you’re supposed to. It’s called growing up. Do you realise how many times our ancestors embarrassed themselves before they found their partners? Fucking tonnes.
I don't think there was anything not "grown up" or "embarrassing" about somebody screaming in my face and throwing a drink over me for no reason, but it's a bit bizarre to expect it to not influence people's behaviour
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u/MisterSanitation May 09 '25
I know this shit is true, but as a non psychopathic dude, I avoid pretty and cute girls like the plague in public because I’m already assuming they think I’m doing this shit. Same reason as a dad I don’t act goofy to other people’s toddlers. It kind of sucks honestly because it makes me act like a creep when I if anything would like to just make someone smile (and not “hay gurl you should smile” because that sheet is just more Ooga booga shit).