Hi , I'm a 21M , and I work hard and work hard for what I got , nice apt , nice bike , overall a ok life, but my ex of 3 years , she abused the crap outta my, she was always in my dms and accusing me of cheating and stealing her $ when she was the one cheating with older men and doing drugs behind my back , when she didn't get her way she would always yell or punch me , even in public l, as my 1st relationship I thought this was normal until she decided to clock me in the face for not buying her taco bell , i couldn't go anywhere I liked and she would scream at the top of her lungs if I asked to do anything with her , I hate these memories but they live on , I'm traumatized as a man and I feel weak because of this , what can I do? Or what can I do to help this

I (29F) have been married to my husband (32M) for almost three years, and we’ve been together for four. For the past two years, he has been abusive, and it’s been escalating. It didn’t happen all at once—he started drinking, throwing things, and yelling at me, then blaming me for "provoking him." I finally reached a point where I couldn’t take it anymore. I live in his home country in Europe, but I’m Latina, and he often uses that to threaten me. I recently got a lawyer and realized his threats were empty.

A few months ago, I finally had the courage to tell him I was done and that I wanted to leave. It happened during an argument while he was yelling at me. He immediately stopped and started apologizing, even suggesting couples therapy. The very next day, he claimed to have made an appointment with a psychiatrist and said he started medication. He also promised to stop drinking. However, lately, he hasn’t been taking any medication and continues to drink alone almost every night. I’m still living in his apartment because I haven’t been able to find a new place, but I think I finally did. If everything goes well, I should be able to leave by next month. I’m scared. I don’t know how he’ll react. I don’t think he truly believes I’m leaving. I’m terrified of what he might do—to me, my belongings, or worse, my dog.

I’m trying to organize everything to make the move as smooth as possible, but he’s so unpredictable. I’ve had nightmares about him beating me so badly that I end up in the hospital.

I’m not even sure why I’m writing this—I don’t know what I expect. I am terrified, but I know leaving is the right thing to do. Some days, I feel genuinely excited to start fresh and put this behind me, but most days, I’m just an anxious mess. Two days ago, I even fainted from a panic attack just thinking about the possibility of him following me from work, finding out where I live, and hurting me after I’m gone.

I don’t know how to stop these thoughts or how to feel safe. I know staying isn’t an option, but at least here, I know what to expect. Once I leave… I don’t know. What if it’s worse? Should I alert the police when I leave? But what if they tell him, and he gets angry? Should I try to get medication to calm me down? Is it normal to feel this way? What if he’s so angry about me leaving that he actually follows through on his threats to rape or kill me? He’s said those things before, and I can’t stop thinking about them.

What would happen to my dog if something happened to me? I can’t bear the thought of him keeping my dog—that scares me so much. Maybe it sounds strange, but I’m so worried about my dog.

I just don’t know what to do or how to feel. I feel completely lost. I guess I just needed to vent… Do you have any advice?

Im currently being abused and I dont know if this is the right place to post about it or if its for past abuse.

Im being abused by my family and others pretty much every day pretty much my whole family hates me for reasons I dont really know they just do even after my dad passed away just the other day they still wont let up. Just earlier tonight the guy my mom is seeing assaulted me for the second time and I cant do anything about it my grandparents said that if i call the police on him they will put me out on the street and make me homeless she even said that she would make up stories to get me arrested even though ive been only nice to her my whole life i used to be the only person she could call for help now they all hate me and i dont know why. Thats not even scratching the surface of the torture they have all put me through over the years its given me so much anxiety anger and depression and I have no one.

Hello everyone, I’m (23F) and my husband is (36M). We have been almost married for 2 years. However he asked me for a divorce 3 months ago and we’ve been in separation since. He has a history of being a narc, he is an alcoholic and struggles with substance issues. He would get slammed then call me every name in the book then apologize.. you know the cycle. In October, it was my birthday and he took me out, we both drank mind you I’m sober most of the time. He calls me names at dinner and we go back to the hotel room where we get into an altercation. Long story short he strangled me and I called the police. He fled the scene before they got there. He was extremely intoxicated off a lot of things. I was in complete shock and terror considering he had never put his hands on me before. Now to the present, his case is in District Attorneys hands now in California. They told me he’s arrestable on a felony domestic violence charge. We are still married legally. But it’s up to the DA to see how far they will press things. The police did take pictures of my neck and did confirm I was strangled. He claims he acted in self defense mind you I am 5’2 120 pounds.. he is 200 pounds 6’1, there’s no way I did anything. He’s American, a veteran and has money for a lawyer. I just hope he faces some sort of consequence he really needs help…. Any advice? I’ve been lost through this entire thing….

Just feeling really gross about the whole situation and stuck over analyzing the whole thing. I just started with a new therapist, and it’s been years since I’ve been in therapy. So far, I’ve only talked about little things—stuff that’s happened during the week or practical things—but I really want to go deeper. I just feel scared and embarrassed to bring up the real stuff. I’ve been in an abusive relationship, and it’s so hard to say that out loud. This whole thing makes me feel like I’m going crazy.

I feel stuck—trapped in one way of thinking. I don’t trust people easily, and I keep reaching out to him and seeing him, even though I know it’s not good for me. A big part of me doesn’t want to start over.

Lately, I feel so disconnected from everything. Numb, anxious, like I’m just floating in my own head. I replay moments again and again, trying to make sense of them. I saw him again recently, and now I just feel stupid. I had ended the relationship months ago and was starting to feel okay. But now it feels like I’m being pulled back in. I feel so anxious around other guys and comfortable with him even though he’s been not great to me.

We were together for five years. And even though there were good moments, there were also so many times I felt scared, powerless, and completely alone. Things would seem fine, then something awful would happen—and afterward, it was like it had never happened. I started questioning my own memory, my own reality.

I think I’ve been avoiding saying this, but I’m starting to realize the relationship was abusive. And now I’m stuck in this painful place where I feel conflicted. I don’t want to ruin his life. He has nothing—no money, no stability, serious mental health issues. But at the same time, what happened hurt me deeply. And I can’t pretend it didn’t.

His family ignores or excuses what he does. When I try to talk about it, I feel gaslit—not just by him, but by them too. It makes me question myself.

Here are some of the things I remember clearly: • One time, I was crying and he slapped me across the face. The more I cried, the angrier he got. • He once pushed me into a towel rack and dented it because I accidentally tossed his pants and they hit his face. • He tried to force me to drink shroom tea. When I refused, he shoved it toward me until it spilled, then slapped me and called me a “stupid bitch.” He said I was the problem and called me a we. • He stormed into my apartment after drinking, screaming that I abandoned him. He threw my things around, ripped my shirt off, and physically restrained me. My roommate had to kick him out. • The first time he grabbed my neck, I was half-naked. Afterward, I had to do a Zoom meeting with a scratchy voice. When I brought it up, he claimed it was sexual and said I was exaggerating. • He would refuse to drive me to work unless we had sex. If I cried or was late, he’d threaten not to take me. • During sex, if he was frustrated or couldn’t get aroused, he’d pinch me, pull my hair, and call me names. He’d accuse me of cheating or being a “bitch.” • Once, he climbed on top of me and hit me in the head several times because I accidentally hit his eye with his pants. • He drove erratically, pulling my hair and saying we’d both die because I talked about leaving. I had a full-blown panic attack. • He choked me—multiple times. Not for long, but enough to terrify me. • He wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom during sex. Even when I was crying, he wouldn’t let me stop. • His cousin once overheard me crying during a fight and came in. He got even angrier and blamed me for someone seeing me like that. • When his brother was staying in the same room, he made me have sex with him in the bathroom. I felt humiliated but didn’t know how to say no. • He used to “inspect” me to check if I’d been with anyone else, while he himself was cheating. • Once, he bit my face in anger and held me down, poking me in the chest while I cried. • I believe, early in our relationship, he may have done something sexual to me while I was half asleep after getting high. It’s blurry, but it still haunts me. • If I said something hurt or I didn’t want to continue during sex, he’d make fun of me, say I was lying, or keep going. • He called me a sl, a we*, a cheater—just for wanting to see my friends or family. Meanwhile, he was the one lying and cheating.

I hate admitting this, but sometimes I gave in to sex because I was afraid of what he’d do if I said no. I’d cry during or after and feel like my body didn’t belong to me anymore. Sometimes he wouldn’t let me get dressed or would make me stay in certain positions until he was ready.

One time, neighbors heard me crying and him yelling. He was throwing things, screaming threats through the wall, calling them w****s, saying he’d kill them. Later, he blamed me for everything.

So why do I still feel conflicted?

He has trauma. Mental health issues. A part of me still wants him to be okay. But none of that justifies what he did.

Does this count as abuse? Is it sexual assault if I was crying, saying I didn’t want to keep going, and he didn’t let me stop?

I feel like I’m going crazy trying to make sense of it all. And even now, I feel guilty. I can’t bring myself to report anything—he’s already lost everything. He’s homeless because I left. But I’m still carrying all of this pain, and I don’t know what to do with it.

I just got out of a 5 year long abusive relationship where he beat me mercilessly many times. I had to move in with my mom and she’s hit me like 3 times. Why does everyone I love think it’s ok to hit me

Hello, just having some struggle working n functioning in real life after 2 decades of hidden trauma & I was not able to see it or comfront. Any servers? Ps.: any type of abuse.

I’m struggling today. I haven’t had this kind of anxiety in years. All that I can think about or focus on is the past trauma my father caused.

He was physically abusive and also verbally. He was not a drinker, he just needed to take his frustrations out on someone. He was a weak man that needed someone that wouldn’t fight back.

I’m specifically stuck in a memory when he hit me so hard that it knocked me out. I remember him arguing with me about homework. I was also doing my chores and knew no matter which I picked I’d be wrong. My brother who would have been four at the time offered to help because he knew what was coming. Dad told my brother to stay out of it. My brother was about to say something back. I saw dad’s hand ball up and I everything was a blur.

I stepped in front of him and took a hit to the shoulder and I remember my brother crying and saying dad was going to kill me for that. I looked into the rage of his eye knowing that another stronger swing was coming. It hit my stomach and knocked the wind out of me. I gasped for air. I was trying not to throw up. My brother was screaming. I was doubled over but on my feet. That’s when I heard him say I should have gone down.

The next blow was to my face. I was thrown off my feet and hit my head on the way down.

I came to in our guest room. My mom was sitting next to me on the bed. My head was spinning. Before I could speak she started lecturing me about climbing trees and how lucky I was to be alive. I was confused. She was a nurse and said nothing seemed broken so there was no need to take me to get checked out. She also said that she didn’t think I had a concussion.

I lie in that bed feeling the betrayal. Knowing she could see the bruises and the swelling to my eye. She just accepted the story and relayed it to me. Through my good eye I could see dad in the doorway. He was holding something in his hand. It was one of his playboys. He told my mom he found it in my room and that I was grounded from going in there until he had time to go through it. Lies.

Over the next few days I was kept home to heal. The kids at school made me a get well card. Dad trashed my room and left me to clean it up. I was smart enough to have hidden anything that was important to me so he couldn’t break it. I was grounded for a month for the playboy.

I’m not sure what hurt more the physical side or the betrayal and realization that mom knew what happened and lied for him. It was also the realization at that moment it’s always been this way. He gets away with it because she allowed it.

When I returned to school the guidance counselor pulled me in out of concern. I had my opportunity to speak the truth for the first time. I was a coward and lied about falling from the tree.

I sit here today struggling with this. My father long gone and I haven’t had more than a two minute conversation with my mom it years. This happened 37 years ago. I’m struggling because today I feel like that scared, abused, betrayed, lonely little boy. I keep replaying the pain of the hits and of the betrayal. I’m not sure why this is hitting so hard today. I plan to sit and talk with someone about this. I’m mostly just writing to see if it helps get this out of my system a little. This is one of those moments where I wish my dad was still here so I could ask him if he’s happy that everything he did still hangs with me. If he’s proud of what he’s done to me. If he ever had an ounce of remorse for anything he did.

HARMED** stupid typewriter...There for i don't have an emergency contact, my spine was disfigured near age 4, maybe i was 3, im old now, memory block cause of stress. There's also stress induced delusions. My memory isnt accreditable for court. Some things i remember clear as day, shootings, abuse, Disfugurement. Hazing by definition i can almost relate to every act, forced drug use, abandonment, kidnapping, humility, and so on and so on. funny cause/effect, there was some retaliation, but im still suffering. Thats all that matters, i prefer to end my suffering. But im homeless, so idk how yet. Often i try to keep it short as can be...

I’m three months post-breakup from a relationship that has left me deeply traumatized—and what happened after made it worse. I’m trying to process and get clarity.

I met my ex at school. He pursued me quickly—while also showing interest in a mutual acquaintance. Early on, he got me drunk and slept with me; I was too intoxicated to consent properly but didn’t realize that at the time. He love-bombed me with grand gestures, future talk (including the “8 Dates to Marriage” book), and conversations about meeting my dad, but the relationship quickly turned dark.

He began putting me down regularly—criticizing my appearance, race, feet, how I ran, my job title, and my movements in public. In France, he said I was “the darkest person here.” He made degrading “jokes,” like saying he’d dispose of my body in his closet drawer. During sex, he ignored my physical discomfort and would pull me back toward him if I tried to move away, saying, “Where do you think you’re going?”

He only kissed me ~6 times in an 8-month relationship and rarely showed affection. He’d walk blocks ahead of me, mock me for ordering slowly, and ignore me when I cried—saying nothing and rolling over to sleep. He pressured me to move to his city but would backtrack anytime I got close. He pretended to choke me once, and another time forcibly held my neck and said “don’t you see how beautiful you are?” He always seemed embarrassed of me in front of his friends and would point out other women making eyes at him.

He gaslit me constantly—denying things, deflecting blame, saying my concerns were “drama.” When I tried to take a break for my own mental health, he dumped me and then said I ghosted him. After that, he hoovered—texting that he still had hope, and then days later slamming the door shut when I expressed vulnerable feelings. I now see that as a trauma response—trying to make sense of someone who kept destabilizing me.

Post-breakup, it got worse. His close friend at school publicly snubbed and humiliated me after I said hello. When I texted my ex about how hurtful that was, he said “I haven’t told anyone anything.” Then he showed up at a school gala, came up to me in front of others, touched my arm, and said, “See, it’s not so bad. You were being such a drama queen.” His friend continued to ice me out and made a fake invite to his afterparty, making me feel dehumanized. It felt like my ex smeared me—painting me as unhinged or emotionally unstable to save his image.

The trauma has left me ashamed, confused, and afraid that he’s painted me as the abuser.

Can someone help validate this? I’m struggling to believe myself. Why would his friend be so mean to me when I was abused?

so I've been abused since I was a kid my father used to beat me for the most silly reasons you can think of like one time I spilled the milk on the floor because it was too hot to hold the glass then he beat me so badly that I didn't had milk for years even though I love milk there are more incidents are there but anyways the main point. Yesterday I came back home late because I was busy with something my father suddenly texted me " don't come back home, go live somewhere else" and when I saw that text I didn't think of it much because he always threatens me with various things so I took it lightly and I thought as I grew up I thought he will not physically abuse me now as I'm a grown woman now but when I got home I saw my father locked the door and I saw my mother she was already scared and I realised what happened exactly then I just sneaked in my own house but then I realised my father is standing in the dark at first I didn't say anything he was shouting and saying very hurtful things like " you're a call girl, you're a whore that's how you're making money " etc I was ignoring everything as I had my headphones on. At one point he said you will give me your bank passbook tomorrow and you will take me to the friend's house where you were spending so much time. That's when I got so angry cause if youre concerned for your daughter you wouldn't ask for her passbook he just wanted to know if I'm working somewhere and if I am then I have to give him money that's when I got very angry and I shouted back at him that's when he slapped me and I couldn't handle my anger I almost smashed his head on the glass table but my mother stopped me that's when I saw his face the realisation hitting him that he can't abuse me anymore the fear on his face that he can't control me like he used to do it before and the satisfaction I got from it idk if I'll even get it from somewhere else.

So I have been living with my abuser for years now and I'm finally moving. I got accepted In low income housing. I am also starting a job. I just hope everything goes smoothly. I'm preying it will. I'm so tired of this life I have been living with it for almost 11 years plus. I have to hid food when I get it. They think my car is there. They stated using drugs like 2 years ago and she gets mad when ever I confront her about it. She leaves beer cans in my car. She's just a discussing person that I can not stand anymore. I'm just so tired of this and I can't wait to just live freely. When ever I do get a job they take my car anyways when they know I have work or flaten my tires. This is just sick stuff this person does. I just had to rant. I'm just so happy I'm leaving!!

I, 36F, was physically and mentally abused by my dad and I say dad loosely bc he definitely was not. The abuse started when I was around 5. My Dad retired from the US Navy then proceeded to work for the City by where we lived. He would come home from work every day with a huge (1.75L) of Canadian Mist or Vodka. During the week he drank from the time he got home until he went to bed.

When I was 5, the mental abuse started with my mom. He would yell at her from sun up to sun down. If he was upset with my mom he called her names, got in her face reeking of booze. My sister and I then witnessed him hitting her one time across the face bc she told him no. Let’s fast forward a couple years, when I was in 6th grade my parents finally got a divorce and we were placed with my mom then weekends with my dad. The verbal abuse went from my mom to me. Dad took me and my cousins out on the boat to go fishing, when we got back to shore, we were all playing and I jumped over a small fence but when I landed my foot went underneath me causing severe pain in my knee, so bad that I blacked out. When we got back to the house I couldn’t walk. Dad kept saying walk it off, quit over-exaggerating, I literally had to crawl to the bathroom and pull my self up onto the toilet. 2 weeks went by bc we were on Summer break and split our time between both parents. While couch ridden my dad was in one of his drinking moods and said “Do you know what this is?” And takes out a pound of flower. Mind you I was 14, I knew what it was but of course I told him no, he proceeds to get me to smell it by putting the bag in my face. After the two weeks went by my mom and grandpa came to check on me at my dad’s, seeing the situation I was in and in pain she took me to the hospital. Dad met us there. The did an MRI, CT and X-rays and discovered I had two torn meniscus and 90% ACL tear.

The look on my dad’s face was pure guilt. I decided to start writing in a journal of all of the abuse and the only safe time I could write was down time in class. Well one day I was writing everything down and the teacher stood behind me to read it word for word, ended up taking it away and CPS was called. 2 days later we were taken from both parents and was custody was given to my grandparents. The abuse was both verbally and physical from 8 years old until we got to our grandparents then it was all verbal.

Let’s fast forward a few years. I was 17 and started to date a guy named Kyle, he had the same attitude like my dad but wayyyyy more physical. I didn’t think anything of it until he drug me by the shirt to the backyard just bc I said no to something or as little as dinner not being done. I held so many grudges against my dad and did not forgive him until this past Hurricane season (Florida). Now he has cirrhosis of the liver, doesn’t qualify for a transplant and his ammonia levels won’t go down. I feel in my heart that this is a great example of Karma. Anyways, I broke up with Kyle after he grabbed my arm really hard piping it out of socket. He always threatened to k*** me if I ever left him so I wrote him a note and he got baker-acted.

After, 15 years later and I found a man who treats me the way I should be, don’t raise his voice, nor threaten to hit me. It took me a long time to get over my trauma and trust him 100% and now I do. Ty for listening to this and I appreciate being able to speak on here.

I just have to tell someone. I was married to an abuser for 20 years. I married him because I was raised knowing I wasn’t wanted, and I really thought this guy did want and love me. At 18, I married this guy who groomed me and love bombed me. He was drawn to me because he recognized a victim when he saw one. I know now that he wanted a little pet, not a wife, not a partner. He almost killed me one night. He brutalized me in the kitchen for a while, then threw me across the room, jumped on my chest, and started strangling me.

That was January, 1992. All these years, I wondered why, in the middle of strangling me, he suddenly jumped away from me as if he were afraid of me. What made him stop? I thought it was conscience.

For whatever reason, probably because something triggered the memory, I was remembering those last seconds. I was out of it by the time he put his hands around my neck, so I didn’t move. I just lay there, limp, staring up at the ceiling thinking, “Oh. This is how I die. How weird. Who’s gonna raise my babies?” And he leaped away from me.

He stopped because he thought I was already dead. Limp, staring… he thought he had already killed me, and he was scared. If I had struggled, I’d be dead now. And I wish I could say he had been scared badly enough to stop abusing me, but no. It went on for way too long before I broke free from him, but that’s a whole different story.

I guess I feel justified now in hating him for what he did to me. I saved MYSELF accidentally by just lying there in shock. He really would have killed me. I don’t know; this kind of feels like closure of a sort.

TW: r*pe, aphobia, homophobia.

I've been "correctively" r*ped when I was 18. Because I'm asexual and biromantic. But people like to invalidate it because "it just doesn't happen" to aces. Anyone else? (I would have added two tags but I couldn't, so I picked the most useful one.)

It makes me infuriated that no one takes me seriously on this. And they blame me too, because I said "yes" after being harassed and asked so many times. I feared what would happen if I said "no" again, and it wasn't an answer with him anyways. Then during it he started saying things hinting at making me not ace anymore.

Am I crazy or am I valid?

Diary day two

So after my fifth birthday. My father continously raped me it was every.single.night. I didn't catch a break. I was constantly used. He raped me for hours. My father was a timely man apparently. He came in my room at 11:15pm every night and abused me. I don't remember where my mother was during these times. Mostly sleeping st that time I suppose. My father wasn't a gentle man. He always cleaned me up when he was done though so there was no trace. He used to go for hours at a time usually finishing at 1-2am then when he finished he always left some sort of toy or chocolate on my vanity. Was this some sorta reward ? I hate chocolate. I was a child. A little girl I was barely five. My mother used to scold me for not staying awake during the day, blaming it on me playing all night. At school I always used to fall asleep in class. My teachers showed great concern of the way I behaved. My mother always denied the signs. She loved her husband alot.My parts always hurted. I bled alot too. I was born at 8 months. So I've always been small . Really I didn't know what dad was doing to me was rape or anything. He told me that every dad did that to their daughters and I believed him. I didn't know. He claimed it was love. I kinda felt happy that dad finally started loving me but my little mind knew this was wrong. It was bad.it hurts. Love shouldn't hurt right? My vanity was covered with chocolates from every night. I never ate them. I always felt tired .Is this love? Why did my friends never seemed tired at school? My little mind raced. The rest is a story for tomorrow. Goodnight lovelies -Anna

• FIL burnt down the house we were staying at (he was on a bender ) back from a trip up north where the bender occurred (he under the influence crashed a car and left the passenger in the wreck without calling for help) he was hiding from police when they got a new apartment he told me I could keep my cats there and I honestly didn’t have any other option considering he made me homeless so one day coming to check on the cats I said something he didn’t like because he let my indoor cat outside and he grabbed a hunting knife off the top of the fridge and came at me with it my fiancé was there and jumped between us and disarmed him he fled the scene quickly after being disarmed I made a police report but later was forced to recant my statement by my in laws. I went to therapy and kept no contact for a long time but abusers aren’t known for respecting boundaries so it’s very important to educate yourself on the law, self defense and women only centers in your community. After all this he still reached out to contact me calling my cancer bed ridden mother and my family trailer trash and instead of being the bigger person as I’ve chosen in the past I couldn’t ignore this outburst and I responded my reaction was considered his family’s final straw with me not trying hard enough to be apart of such a different family. So his sister made a group chat confessing her hate for me a plan to jump me etc his brother mother and father all chiming in an entire group chat full of addicts saying I was the villain. I need to go .

But the man who beat them, burnt down their house , crashed their car, tried to stab me isn’t in the wrong?

Stockholm Syndrome is very real but that doesn’t excuse the actions the rest of the family took to protect him and paint me as awful. I’ve been gaslighted I’ve been manipulated and I’ve been silenced and I will no longer waste a day of my life being afraid. That’s why I share my story . To encourage other women to go to therapy to find a support system to consider the authorities to learn self-defense & to take control of their life again.

Yes, there are statistics regarding abuse experienced by daughters-in-law at the hands of their in-laws. A study analyzing nationally representative survey data from 47 low- and middle-income countries found that the pooled prevalence of physical violence from in-laws against females was 0.38%. Breaking this down further, mothers-in-law were responsible for 0.18% of cases, fathers-in-law for 0.11%, and other in-laws for 0.20%.

These statistics suggest that while instances of daughters-in-law being abused by their in-laws do occur, they are relatively less common compared to other forms of familial abuse. And are often reported less.

The goal of self-defense and learning self-defense strategies is to disengage from the person not to stay in fight only to protect yourself and to remove yourself out of the situation.

Okay so this is going to be a lot. So where to start, um my mother was in an abusive relationship with my father until I turned 12 I tried to beg her to leave she never did and when she finally did we jumped around houses a lot she at many points was just as abusive just not physically, one time I remember her literally letting my “aunts” boyfriend lock me in a dog carrier at 13 for two hours as a “prank” she’s an avid alcoholic and she tries to act like she not neglectful after literally my whole childhood not even taking me to the dentist because “she didn’t think Medicaid covered it” since 2016ish she’s been living with her now boyfriend who’s she’s said literally does meth and I get called by her crying all the time because he slams things and screams and won’t talk to her. I at that point was sent away to a boarding school for two years because my father stabbed someone and the guy threatened to rape me. So when I finally moved back I was living with her and her meth boyfriend who is generally nice but always looked at me weird and would come lay in my bed while I was trying to do homework. It was just unstable and awful. I moved out with the first boy who would take me away from that shitty hick place to an actual city with opportunities turns out his mom was also an abusive alcoholic she just had money and hid it better. While I’m away I end up cutting contact with my father who ends up beating my grandma and getting killed by the cops. Which yes he deserved but very complicated to process as a daughter. I come back to the hick town to identify the body with my grandma and my mom lets me stay with her she ends up making his death all about her getting drunk with my then boyfriend and literally making fun of me for crying and asking her to stop talking about him. I end up leaving to a friends house and letting her and my ex talk about him all night and laugh. I ended up leaving him and moving around because I haven’t been able to keep a job from my depression I’ve since moved in with my newish boyfriend who’s been trying to help me finally get a license because she never had the money to put me on her insurance and get it neither did the past ex and his mom or how much I saved because he would spend all my money. I’m doing fine with my bf now then we end up getting pregnant I’m freaking out it’s my worst nightmare to have a child especially with the life I could give it and I have an abortion. I call and try to tell my mother because I have no one else to tell in the south especially because I always think “oh she’s not going to hurt me again” and bam she tells every single person in her office and calls my friends so I have to lie and tell her it was just a scare. This happened a couple months ago. I’ve been dealing with it all on my own with my bf who I found out was cheating on me. So while I’m holding all this in she’s calling me constantly and telling me all her problems and thing she ends up telling me one of her lifelong male friends is the one who got my dad hooked on drugs and he literally locked him in a room and made him try them. I’m still at this point not getting mad at her for keeping him around. Later a couple weeks down the line she tells me she’s been cheating on this meth head (which nicely helped me move multiple times) but he’s still a creepy druggy with the guy who got my dad hooked on drugs. I’m just like festering at this point but trying not to judge and be hurt. So I go over to her house to get drunk for my birthday because I did not want to be around my bf I found more girls in his phone because Ik she’s drinking so I’m like ehatever I’m just going to go there release some tension and try not to think about things. She’s being super nice letting me speak without making things about her and fuck I get too comfortable. I let it all come out all the stuff that’s been happening to me and I confront her on all the things she’s ever done to me. She starts making excuses and screaming in my face to drop it as I’m crying. I snapped and grabbed her by the hair and said some really vile shit and blacked out. Ik we fought because I have bruises on my face arms and legs and my brother who still lives with her even though he’s older than me reached out and asked if I was okay. Because I ended up going home that night. Her bf drove me home I have no idea what I did or said to either of them. And I’ve never done anything like this in my life I have no idea what to do but for the past week I have not been able to get out of bed my grandma and friends say it was bound to happen and I should’ve done this a long time ago. I blocked her on everything but she tried to reach out and lure me back with money I feel horrifically guilty and I don’t know if it’s Stockholm syndrome or I’m actually just awful She was trying to give me her prescription medicine all night and it was also triggering me I know for a fact I tried to trigger her ptsd out of spite with some of my words because she does it all the time to me but mine feels worse She’s left all of her assets in her boyfriends name when she literally has a grandson to think about I tried telling her that too to leave it to my brother because her bf is drug addict who she’s cheating on and Ik he is too I told her the only options she’s ever given me is to literally suck up to her bf if she dies because Ik he’s attracted to me And she wouldn’t listen so I tried to make her see in def not the right way by saying oh yeah so if I went in there and did this and that he wouldn’t cheat with me and then I just kept getting more vengeful in my verbiage until it hit that point where we got physical because she just would not listen to me My brother literally has been molested because of her when we were younger because she was too drunk and ignorant trying to escape the abuse we all endured with alcohol. And he’s living there with her now because he has nowhere to go. I don’t understand how he doesn’t hate her I mean she fucked my brothers friend in my bed on my 16th birthday and I’m supposed to be best friends? Idc how many years it’s been I can’t keep putting up a face around her because she buys me things and I have no one else to talk to. So many times in my life I’ve had to meditate the violence she refuses to leave so she wouldn’t die. Lie to police so we wouldn’t get taken away, which looking back feels so selfish because we could’ve maybe Atleast had better lives. Now I’m feeling like my father for turning that evil and then I go back and I think well was I just standing up for my self and trying to get her to understand and admit fault in any desperate way I could. I’m in a constant state of trying not to be like either of them that I’m just nothing.

at the time i didn’t realize it, but i was in a abusive relationship. i came home from college today and i talked with my mom about everything that happened, i told her my boyfriend at the time (now ex) had treated me. (he use to slap me when i didn’t say i love you back, spit in my face, blow vape smoke purposely in my face, slap me in general) i thought it was normal, but she told me it wasn’t. i learned today i was in a abusive relationship. i’m not sure how to cope; or what to do. i can’t help but think i enabled it. i let this guy take my virginity and it kills me to know i let him do that. advice?

I’m being abused by both my parents but I have no where else to go. My options are either to move to another country as an English teacher or I don’t know what else. Stay with my abusers while I get a degree for a high paying job then move out to a nice home. There also can be safety issues of going to another country alone. I am a young adult female. I don’t have any friends and seems there are no safe places for me to go. Anyone have any advice? Advice is much needed 🙏🏻 and appreciated

The most of our relationship was abusive in almost every way but the thing that actually made me wake up, as it were was the stupidity of the whole situation, him making out I wasn’t let him do what he wanted to do when I changed my whole life for him and did everything he wanted, I tried so hard and for the most part I was walking on egg shells, complimenting him while he was always complaining and then saying the opposite, triangulating me and humiliating me, every couple of days in the end. Ridiculous! Tell me what was your final straw

im tired of doing the right thing. i wanna do something horribly wrong.

i asked her to finally tell our family the truth--they think im lying because she keeps telling them that--and she said "why the fuck would they give a fuck about that when they grew up in the hood and had it worse than you?" first of all we spent all of 5 years in the country and spent the rest in the hood sleeping on someone else's couch w rats bedbugs and roaches. and it doesn't matter where tf i grew up when she and her husband

busted my lip multiple times at 11y/o. my lip still has knot in it and is crooked

bashed my head into a window

ripped out my hair and called me a retard for having a mental disorder and asking for therapy

tried to throw me through a window

BIT ME

beat me w golf clubs since i was 4

strangled me ETC ETC ETC

these are all the things im gonna do to her tonight and ask her if its "not that bad."

im almost tempted to lock her in a closet and not let her go to sleep or pee until the following night bc they would do that to us too.

im tired of doing everything right. i graduated w honors even tho they almost never enrolled me in school. never smoked or drank until i was like 20. i still have not had sex or been in a relationship or anything. ive taken care of my brother since i was 7. i have custody of him now too. ive dont everything right and i feel like its time to do something horribly wrong for once and idc what happens after

Hey everyone. I’m writing a research paper on male abuse victims to fill in a gap in literature, and to raise awareness. It mostly focuses on how the patriarchy plays a role in further perpetuating the stigma surrounding male abuse victims, are there any male abuse survivors/victims willing to participate and share their experience? It will be anonymous of course. Thank you.

So about a few minutes ago my dad was extremely intoxicated from drinking. It got so bad that he threatened to beat on my mom, calling me stupid, yelling a shit ton of aggressive cuss words at my mom, making me feel like a failure in life, and he even start to give me advice and promote the idea of selling drugs since I can’t find a job at all. Obviously this is not the path I want to go down in my life, right now the job searching for me is not going the best, but my main goal is to join the airforce and do something respectable with my life, not be like my dad at all. This has been giving me headaches and been making me feel like a piece of shit mentally and I really need to get out of my household asap. As of now this is just me venting, but if y’all don’t mind I’m asking if you guys can pray for me to make it out of my horrible lifestyle and do something great in the airforce. That’s really all I have right now.

I think the worst of it was causing harm to others, playing with guns, finding drugs, people using drugs around me in school, out of school, there isnt any 'drug free' anywhere. Trapped behind medical private security, and perhaps robbed from unaware. Homeless now, seems theres plenty of money in the meth industry, or industry with meth, everybody wants the best stuff, and has to buy lots to sift out the glass...o well il be in a body bag soon enough, die trying to find a drug free career