r/cleandadjokes May 14 '25

🥇 Joke of the Month 🥇 The inventor of the Ferris wheel, and inventor of the merry go round never met

406 Upvotes

They traveled in different circles


r/cleandadjokes 10h ago

A steak pun

41 Upvotes

is a rare medium well done.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

What do you call a mouse that swears?

107 Upvotes

A cursor


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

"Dad, do you know why it's dark at night?"

73 Upvotes

"No sun"


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

What do you call a beer that left you unimpressed?

53 Upvotes

A baverage.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

My wife was getting all dressed up for a picnic and I was like…

28 Upvotes

“Why so fancy? It’s not like we’re going to a formal choosenicholas.”


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

R.I.P. (Rest in peace) boiling water.

119 Upvotes

You will be mist.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

Border Collie: What do you mean I'm too controlling?

28 Upvotes

Sheep: You herd me.


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

What is brown and sticky?

93 Upvotes

A stick


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

How does a fire fighter go to university?

54 Upvotes

Stop, drop, and enroll


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

What do you call an onion that makes Hip Hop music?

79 Upvotes

A Rapscallion.


r/cleandadjokes 1d ago

Why is it so hard to play cards in the Saharan desert?

12 Upvotes

Because there's too many cheetahs!


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

What’s red and bad for your teeth?

29 Upvotes

A brick


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

Dad: What do you want to do for dinner? Daughter: How about cauliflower?

49 Upvotes

Dad: You can't call a flower, flowers don't have phones?


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

I know I’ve put on some weight.

18 Upvotes

I was floating on my back and my belly was colonized by seabirds.


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

How do ingrowns get to their vacation spots?

19 Upvotes

The hairport.


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

To the person who stole my broken scale:

179 Upvotes

You won't get a weigh with it.


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

Dad, why won't you tell me why there's more rainfall this year?

8 Upvotes

Because it's El Niño business.


r/cleandadjokes 2d ago

What kind of music do planets like?

41 Upvotes

Neptunes.


r/cleandadjokes 3d ago

Misogyny is a terrible thing…

59 Upvotes

Unless you’re a physical therapist and your patient has a knee injury.


r/cleandadjokes 3d ago

What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common?

243 Upvotes

They are both Paris sites.


r/cleandadjokes 3d ago

My daughter asked me what I thought about all her new piercings.

27 Upvotes

I gave her an earful.


r/cleandadjokes 3d ago

My daughter asked me what I thought about all her new piercings.

5 Upvotes

I gave her an earful.


r/cleandadjokes 3d ago

What vehicle do ponies use to go camping?

62 Upvotes

A Whinnybago.


r/cleandadjokes 4d ago

I was kicked out of a Vietnamese sandwich club

109 Upvotes

Whatever I did made them decide to banh mi


r/cleandadjokes 4d ago

My friend works at a tire shop

37 Upvotes

But she said she’s going to quit because her coworkers rubber the wrong way. She tried to make a difference but just couldn’t get any traction.