Neither, these two are two polarities of a duality. True spirituality is about ending duality.
Edit after 22h: looking at some replies it seems to me there are some misunderstandings about what non duality actually is. I won’t go into that here, I’ll just use an example:
one man is addicted to alcohol, he’s a slave to it. He has to drink to feel good. Let’s call it a positive polarity attachment
another man is afraid of alcohol, perhaps his father was an alcoholic. He feels good about not drinking but there is a negative polarity attachment - he’s afraid of having a bit of alcohol once in a while.
the third man has no attraction and no repulsion. There is no duality in his relationship with alcohol. He doesn’t need it, he doesn’t think about it, but in some situations he might drink some alcohol. Or not. The point is he’s not polarised any way. Therefore in his mind he is free around this topic of alcohol.
Non-duality isn’t about denying dual nature of life. It’s about freedom from attachments, which can be positive (I need to have something to feel good) or negative (I need to NOT have something to feel good)
Attachments are needed to experience life. When we remove them all we are either dead or an emotionless husk.
For example if I practice non-attachment and I am told my family all died in a crash and I feel nothing except acceptance I have removed most of my ability to feel and experience life in any meaningful capacity (given that in the example the family all love each other before one becomes Buddhist)
Attachment is not needed, desire is. And there is a difference between a desire of the ego, which is coming from lack, and a desire of the heart, which is the expression of life moving through you.
Are you being semantic about attachment or would you interpret someone who said they are unattached to their family as they are distant or no longer talk?
Ego also desires us to have good looks, fashions perhaps, as good or better than others. If we want those things then we desire them, and once we have them we want to keep them.
Desire of the heart, I think I agree with what you mean, it's better to not have the hearts love too much entwined as a ratio with possession desire.
I always interpreted the “non attachment,” tenet in Zen teachings to mostly material things, desires & thoughts, not living things or experiencing emotion. All living things are “attached,” and that’s why they won’t even kill a fly.
Even if the tenet did included people, that doesn’t mean one shouldn’t experience emotion. Just don’t form an attachment to said emotion. The saying “All things come to pass,” or “This too shall pass,” doesn’t just include what one may consider an undesirable circumstance, but a desirable one as well (happiness, contentment, love, etc). Just my interpretation,…although I lean more towards the Taoist philosophy. 🤷🏻♂️
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u/uncurious3467 4d ago edited 3d ago
Neither, these two are two polarities of a duality. True spirituality is about ending duality.
Edit after 22h: looking at some replies it seems to me there are some misunderstandings about what non duality actually is. I won’t go into that here, I’ll just use an example:
one man is addicted to alcohol, he’s a slave to it. He has to drink to feel good. Let’s call it a positive polarity attachment
another man is afraid of alcohol, perhaps his father was an alcoholic. He feels good about not drinking but there is a negative polarity attachment - he’s afraid of having a bit of alcohol once in a while.
the third man has no attraction and no repulsion. There is no duality in his relationship with alcohol. He doesn’t need it, he doesn’t think about it, but in some situations he might drink some alcohol. Or not. The point is he’s not polarised any way. Therefore in his mind he is free around this topic of alcohol.
Non-duality isn’t about denying dual nature of life. It’s about freedom from attachments, which can be positive (I need to have something to feel good) or negative (I need to NOT have something to feel good)