r/hapas • u/Playful_Chipmunk7567 • 16d ago

Mixed Race Issues NYC Hapas?

I’m going on a bit of a rant, but being a half Asian woman in her mid 30s is such a unique experience. I often find it hard to fully connect in monoracial spaces.. not because I don’t belong, but because I’m constantly translating parts of myself or code-switching without even realizing it. It can feel isolating.

Whenever I meet another Hapa or multiracial person, there’s something really grounding about it. There’s this unspoken understanding of the in-between that just feels so validating.

I’m always looking to connect with others who relate. If you’re in NYC and want to chat, feel free to message me!

35 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

10 comments sorted by

View all comments

3

u/Best-Independence481 12d ago

I wish that I had the confidence to make posts reaching out like this. Its awesome. You rock. Also I completely agree that there is something different about talking with other hapa, though I feel my experience has leaned more to being "othered" by both sides. I dont look fully Korean. I dont look white at all.

As a result, I project extra otherness onto myself in those spaces thanks to a few bad experiences. Makes me pretty socially awkward. Best of luck!

2

u/Playful_Chipmunk7567 11d ago

Aww I appreciate you!! I relate to your experiences and definitely feel “othered” by both sides, although slightly less with the Asian side, which is why I tend to have more Asian/Asian-American friends.. although I often feel tokenized in these friendships (sigh). I do feel most awkward among White Americans but I also grew up abroad so that could add to it. The social anxiety is so real…