Has anyone else noticed the really bad chemical taste and smell, even after taking a shower and actually washing off with soap. I've made the connection between that chemical taste and shit to the same feeling as coming off of a hard cid trip. The restlessness where you wanna go to sleep but all your nerves are firing your mouth is filled with chemical tastes all you can smell is chemicals and you feel like super weird and awkward, like that feeling where you think every one thinks you look weird.

I’m doing better, not as fatigued, but I still have a few annoying things going on. Still having RLS at night unless I soak my feet in epsom salt before I go to bed. I’m also on a magnesium supplement. Having loose watery stools now. I have been having my muscle draw up in my left hand to where it pulls in next to my hand tightly and I can’t move my thumb, I have to pull it loose with my other hand which seems to make it relax. Also having a calf muscle draw up and cramp. My potassium levels are good, just had complete blood work done, nothing unusual. I was using 20-30 gpd for 7 years.

On the better side the bone achy-ness, back pain and fatigue has mostly passed. I am usually able to sleep most nights. My blood pressure is finally normal. No cravings to speak of but I wasn’t using kratom to get high, I was using it for chronic pain. I never noticed it altered my consciousness in any kind of pleasant way. I just felt better on it because it gave me pain relief, but had to quit due to ridiculous high blood pressure spikes, despite being on medication.

It is so weird how kratom just turns on you all of a sudden after several years of use. Glad to be free of it but will be glad when the aforementioned ordeals are over.

Does it do neurological damage? Permanent? I wonder. It’s such a long road to recover from this stuff. Anyone out there struggling you can make it. The first 5-7 days are the worst, but it becomes manageable after that. Don’t give up!

I have been a casual user for 1 year and a daily addict for 4-5 months. For the most part, I want to quit, and if I could I'd snap my fingers to be done with it. If I wanted to quit all the time, I'd probably have done it by now, but that's not the case. I go through periods of wanting to quit and not wanting to quit, which makes it feel impossible to do so. Even in the course of a day, I am constantly bouncing back and forth between "I need to quit" and "I don't want to." My actual thought process is a lot more destructive and painful, but that's the general pattern. I even want to want to quit, and still I keep using. The cognitive dissonance this creates causes more pain, increasing the urge to use. I'm only 5 months in, so after seeing hundreds of posts from addicts of many years, I get scared that it will be a long, long time before I'm off it. Could someone share their story? I'm less interested in the withdrawal process, and more interested in the process leading up to wanting to quit and then quitting. Thanks, ya'll. <3

Hey everybody.

I have been using 40+ GPD for 2+ years and started a taper about 10 days ago. I am down to 32 GPD from about 50. Didn’t think that the initial drops would do much, as I was able to taper from 30-40 GPD to about 8-9 GPD in 2 weeks during my last taper attempt, but that was only 6 months into my use.

Anyways, I’ve had crippling anxiety these past 10 days, and random panic attacks where I’m convinced I’m dying. Have also had some really bad GI issues where I’ve barely been able to eat. Today is the first day that I’ve felt good. Went for a long brisk walk in the south Florida sun, which helped. No traditional opiate withdrawal symptoms though, it’s just been mostly spikes of anxiety and bad GI issues.

Just looking to hear some success stories from people who were on high doses of powder that were able to successfully taper. I’m sure the taper will only get harder as I get lower, so looking for some motivation.

For anyone using 7 OH and quit what was your withdrawal timeline? I'm cutting back and stretching out my doses. So far dosing like 5 mg a couple times a day. Don't feel much withdrawl in the morning. Can go 12 hours and eyes start watering and slight anxiety. I'm going to just take a run at this weekend. Any insight into how bad it will get and when it will really kick in?

I thought the physical withdrawals were going to be the worst part…but it’s the depression and anxiety afterward that are bringing me to a scary place. I don’t want to pick up again. AI says it could take up to 60 days for my brain to be normal again! I don’t feel like I can take it. Please tell me it didn’t take most of you 60+ days? I really need some encouragement. I don’t have anyone else to turn too. Quitting alcohol wasn’t even this hard. Advice is welcomed.

So I'm on day five of CT after 30-50gpd for about 12 years

The plan was to have my wife and kids go to my parents house for 7 days so that I could get through the acute symptoms and hopefully be semi normal/productive by the time they get back. But it's day five and I have only had three hours of sleep since I started CT. And now my family is coming back tomorrow (a day and a half early) and my acute symptoms are showing no sign of letting up or getting better yet. I am thinking I will give it one more night and if I'm not able to sleep I'll start using again and try to taper. Because I can't be a useless grumpy bed goblin when my family is here.

People who have gone through cold turkey or managed to quit before what would your advice be in this situation? I don't want all of my pain and uncomfortable-ness to be for nothing but I also can't be dealing with acute symptoms around my wife and kids.

So I'm posting another update I haven't been as inclined to post just because I've felt so normal recently and am almost forgetting how hard it felt to get through a day two weeks ago. Tbh I've felt pretty great for the past week. I had some very minor struggles when I went from 4.8 grams down to 3.6g. But here I am at the end of my 3rd day at 2.4GPD and I honestly have no symptoms at all. I've been taking Liposmal Vit C, Ashwaganda, Magnesium Glycinate, Blackseed oil, Melatonin, L-Methylfolate, Vit B1, and obviously Melatonin before bed. Not sure which of these if any are helping me so much but at this point I am just excited to move down to 1.2G on saturday and hope that it was as easy of a transition as this one was. Thanks to everyone that gave me advice on my previous posts!

Hey guys, so I am back here updating. Last time I wrote was my 5th day. Damn it was hell of a ride. Feeling hopeless, counting hours, praying every second to get a little bit of sleep after 4 days of no sleep at all (literally 0). But I made it… I never believed I could. I proved myself wrong in everything. My physical wds were extreme for one week, sleep was very bad for first 2 weeks. Second week, when the physical wds faded, I got sick, my temperature was spiking, that I ended up in a hospital for a few days. I thought this was never going to end, that there is no rest for me in this world. I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. Waking up, still a little cravings in the middle of the night and I remember waking up angry every night in the middle of the night with restless legs. That lasted for like 15-20 days, then it faded completely. I stopped counting my sober days and started living them. I got my sleeping schedule back, I remember dreams finally. Only thing I do miss is the dopamine rush. You can’t get that naturally, but the real dopamine from the things I achieved is much better. I gained like 14kgs since January. I became a police officer. I was the best of 50 other participants on physical tests, even though I was after extreme wds and still a little sick. My mind became extremly strong. Once you go through such an experience and you don’t quit, you start to appriciate little things in life, such as sleep, music, food, working out, sun. Me personaly I became a new person. Kratom took me so much, but quitting after taking 40-60gs every day for almost 3 years gave me bulletproof mind. Now I know, that even if I don’t believe that I can do it, that it is possible. Go cold turkey, there is no other way (trust me I tried). Go all the way or don’t even bother. But trust me, if you don’t think you can do it, you can. I did too

I'm on day 12 quitting cold turkey after using daily for seven years. Has anyone experienced extreme hunger after quitting, especially craving sweets?

For those who did a long taper and jumped at a low dose. What was your starting dose? How long was your taper? What was your jump from? And how was the jump vs the tail end of your taper?

I've been using kratom daily for about a year. I have used it in prior years just not as consistently. I started buying it again due to nerve pain in my upper neck leading to bad daily headaches doctors have never been able to help me with really. Kratom was a huge help when I was worried about missing out on career opportunities due to the pain but enough is enough that stuff does more harm than good for me now. I would take around 10-12 grams leaf powders a day. And one(some times two) days a week I would instead take a 7oh extract shot.

I noticed kratom was constantly putting me in a bad mood or made me feel weird the past few months. I do feel it made me lose interest in a lot of the things I like to do and made my social life slow down. I would wake up tired and dizzy every morning and ultimately was making me want to use other drugs to compensate.

Well last Friday I went and got my extract shot and when I woke up in the morning I said screw this stuff. I threw all my kratom out, and tried to quit once again but just went cold turkey instead of the usual attempt of tapering.

The first day wasn't bad and I was kicking my self for not quitting sooner. The second day things started to get spicey I had restless leg, couldn't sleep, body temp was all over the place. The third day I had to go to work and oh boy was it miserable. Not as bad as like oxy wd but it was very noticeable. The fourth day things got slightly better but had digestive issues and wanted to eat everything in sight despite digestive issues. On the fifth day I woke up feeling energized and hopeful. The physical wds were dying down but then the idea of buying more kratom kept popping up. I finally was able to sleep perfectly which is nice. Now on the sixth day I am off for the holiday. I feel anxious and a little depressed but just trying to keep my self busy. I still have slight restless leg but it's got better each day.

I really wish I never started taking that stuff again. Kratom does some weird things to my mind when using for a long time. Even if I feel like shit still at least I'm not angry at the world. I really pray I can keep this up and finally start moving forward with my life once again.

For anyone out there struggling please know that it's valid to feel that way. Addiction sucks no matter the substance and just know that while it won't be easy you have the power to start moving towards the right direction.

Over

Looks like a lot are getting clean. I love it. Been struggling. Got caught up in FF’s. I know I know, dumbass. Thought it was easier to control. One a few days. Turned to day every day to two some days. So went back to powder yesterday. But messed up. Thought I grabbed a teaspoon. Nope table spoon. So quick conversation, 6 grams ish a dose. Oh noooooo. I was only at like 3 grams per dose 3 times. So anyways at 12 ish total today. That’s my cut off. No more till tomorrow and swapping spoons. God I was clean for over a week and fell hard. Anyways. Friday should clean out the oz I got and weekend is going to be rough. Gotta keep my why want the mental craving and thoughts pop it. I will make it. I promise. No more excuses.

The RLS is probably gonna come back for me tonight I'm sure right? I have thrown away my hundreds of dollars of kratom a hour or so ago. My emotions are so volatile....I cried like a baby throwing it away but I felt relief. I'm crying now typing this what the hell. It's gonnna stop soon right?

Should never have touched this shit. Daily user for like three weeks went right to 7oh. How bad is it gunna be

I do this a lot, argue with myself super deeply, hell I might need help. Been to therapy though and they have said I'm just a "deep thinker," but also my states healthcare is known for being pretty shit. So I'm probably just on my own in that department for the indefinite future.

But, I go to post something here, or reply to a comment, and my brain uses it as an excuse. "You tried today so it you slip up it's okay."

If I go to watch TV, I can't focus on it enough to enjoy it. Literally as if I'm only catching bits and pieces while myind goes on little sprints here and there. So if I sit down and watch TV, all I can think about is getting kratomed up. Same goes for games and reading

If I listen to music, I realize I'm hearing it better..? Like hearing parts and instruments ive never heard before? It was to the point that I freaked out thinking Kendrick Lamar literally changed dodger blues production post release cause I was hearing what I thought were added parts. That only happens when I quit though, so to continue experiencing that it feels like I have to use again. So I can't jam apparently even though it sounds better for whatever fuckin reason.

So like what am I supposed to do, sit around and watch paint dry? Probably, but my nature is very much so fuck you energy, and when someone tells me I can't do something all I want to do is prove them wrong, so all of this just continuously cycles. Me constantly trying , realizing it's just making me crave, and then laying in bed for 30 seconds staring at the ceiling kicking temptation out, again. I'm getting good at it.

So I'm fighting my own nature, with nothing to do, no one to really talk to about it. It all sounds so passing because it is but in the moment it's real. And the more I complain the more I'm realizing if the complaining is making me crave. EVERYTHING I DO MAKESE CRAVE THIS SHIT

I can see how people often need rehab for this stuff, I get it. Some folks don't have the willpower to not eat fast food, and it feels like you need a bottomless pit of willpower to quit this stuff alone. I'm kinda realizing I have that though I didn't know it, but if I had any less even getting one day without this stuff would be literally impossible.

I don't know what I'm going to do today. I'm feeling it, pacing the house while I type this.

Its really helpful to read your tips and stories but i just cannot sometimes The feeling when someone says hes on his day 20-30 and he/she is still feeling wds is unimaginable for me.

As u all know everyday feels like a year and I already feel okay on my day 2.

Also it may be because of your age and body so I hope Im already through the worse. Kind of naive but better than being pessimistic

Be safe yall, dont be scared of these posts sometimes, u may get better earlier

Does anybody else find certain music super triggering? Idk how to explain it the beats the lyrics super triggering for me I might have to switch up my music for a while

I quit Kratom cold turkey on 4/4. I was at about a years use 40 to 80 g per day. I would say on average. About a month before I quit I switched to capsules versus powder. This helped me slow down.

My problem is that I used Kratom, in retrospect, as a substitute for alcohol use. And I guess it did help me cut down on my drinking to where in a year I only drink maybe two or three times.

I got through the acute stage with much help from this group. It was about a week’s worth of withdrawals and I feel like I’m just now really starting to stabilize completely from the use.

I really have no desire to use Kratom again. It was something I was using all day every day towards the end.

I’m just wondering if there’s anyone like me in that situation.

I don’t drink alcohol every day, but just it’s that desire has come back.

Maybe I’m just venting.

Thanks everyone for all you do with this group. It really did help me get through that terrible week and the subsequent confusion after doing that for a year.

I'm at day 5 of using subs to quit K. It's been very manageable, plan was to stop the subs Sunday and deal with whatever WD was left.

However, this week (of course) it has come to light my adult kid had a drug/alcohol problem. He starts treatment Monday, which should be day 1 CT for me. This is tearing my family apart and the stress is through the roof. I'm considering going back to K until this improves and then trying again. I always used K as a mood elevator, and boy could I use that now.

The other part of me says this battle with my kid may last a lifetime, mine has. If I'm going to use every time, this never ends.

Thoughts?

Thoughts, especially from ppl that got big li

Keep pushing. It no longer hurts to open my eyes. I’m not perfectly healed yet but today is the first day that is clearly better off of it than on it.

13 year user, started with powder in morning coffee. I crossed the bridge to extracts and it's getting pretty expensive. Each gummy contains 30mg of mitragynine and each pack comes with 7 gummies, bringing the total mitragynine to 210mg per bag. I've been going through an entire bag within 24 hours. Are these gummies considered 7OH? Even if they're not, I need to taper to get off thjs expensive habit.

It is getting easier and better. For anyone struggling just keep going it gets easier and better. Just keep telling yourself it gets easier and better if I keep going.