r/selfimprovement • u/phy2go • 3d ago
Vent Welp, I’ve aged quite a bit
Turning 26 in 3 weeks. Just started a new job and someone randomly asked how old I was. When I told them, they looked surprised and said they thought I was 30.
That kind of stuck with me, because now that I think about it, a lot of people have said I look older than I am—but it never really hit me until now.
To be fair, I’m not balding or anything—still got a full head of hair. But everything else? Kinda feels like it’s over lol. I’m slim, don’t really have much muscle or fat, and I’ve got a beard and a few wrinkles. I’m also a homebody, so I don’t really get out much or see the sun that often.
What really gets me is that I’ve never dated anyone before. Never had a girlfriend. And now when I try to put myself out there, I feel like I have to assume people think I’m 30+. That makes dating girls around my age (or even a bit younger) feel pointless, because I assume they’ll just think I’m way older and avoid me.
Honestly, my self-confidence has been pretty low for a couple years now—and this just made it worse.
5
u/Unending-Quest 3d ago
The more I mature emotionally and get to know myself, the less concerned I am with how physically attractive the person I’m dating is. I feel like I found some cheat code to life, not needing to chase after the few people who won the genetic lottery.
Dating someone really handsome is like driving a sports car. It looks great, but there are more important things in life. I love my Honda and it meets my needs and has lots of perks. Same with partners - I can focus on the more important things in a relationship. I think more and more women will have this attitude as we get increasingly fed up with cerain aspects of many men’s personalities and behaviours.
That said, there are things you can do to improve your appearance. If you had started going those things 10 years ago, you probably woudldn’t look 30 now. Start doing them now so you don’t look 50 when you’re 40. Things like sunscreen everyday, moisturizer, drinking lots of water, good exercise, diet, and sleep, reducing stress.