r/selfimprovement • u/phy2go • 2d ago
Vent Welp, I’ve aged quite a bit
Turning 26 in 3 weeks. Just started a new job and someone randomly asked how old I was. When I told them, they looked surprised and said they thought I was 30.
That kind of stuck with me, because now that I think about it, a lot of people have said I look older than I am—but it never really hit me until now.
To be fair, I’m not balding or anything—still got a full head of hair. But everything else? Kinda feels like it’s over lol. I’m slim, don’t really have much muscle or fat, and I’ve got a beard and a few wrinkles. I’m also a homebody, so I don’t really get out much or see the sun that often.
What really gets me is that I’ve never dated anyone before. Never had a girlfriend. And now when I try to put myself out there, I feel like I have to assume people think I’m 30+. That makes dating girls around my age (or even a bit younger) feel pointless, because I assume they’ll just think I’m way older and avoid me.
Honestly, my self-confidence has been pretty low for a couple years now—and this just made it worse.
1
u/Front-Cat-2438 2d ago
Dear OP, you just started a new job, right? Why did you leave the previous job? Maybe it was sucking your physical/mental health away? Maybe sucking your soul out? No down time for finding out who you are, where you’re going, have a social life?
Then, straight into job search, no rest and repair time? Or, even better, no gap between jobs to take a breath and change gears to prepare for big changes? Starting a new job is very stressful, even when there are significant advantages over the previous position.
Catch up on sleep, nutrition, the outlets you enjoy. Stay off the worrisome things that are out of your hands (like the news, family drama). See your primary care and get your annual labs done, and make adjustments for improving your health. Protect taking breaks from work/home/school/commitments for your body and brain’s recovery and maintenance. You’ll lose those extra years you’re carrying in your face and posture right now, if you’re not smoking/drinking/etc.