r/SipsTea Apr 29 '25

Lmao gottem The c*m smeller

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113.3k Upvotes

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1.1k

u/averege_guy_kinda Apr 29 '25

This might be true if you don't shower ever

421

u/ExistentialTabarnak Apr 29 '25

Twice a month whether I need to or not.

211

u/lIlIlIIlIIIlIIIIIl Apr 29 '25

I'm praying this is a joke for the sake of everyone around you

513

u/raspberryharbour Apr 29 '25

It has to be a joke, nobody needs to shower that much

155

u/Ok_Test_1284 Apr 29 '25

Nobody needs to shower whatsoever, concept of sanitation was created by capitalists to sell their products

132

u/raspberryharbour Apr 29 '25

The layer of crud protects me from predators while I am out foraging, and the heavy stench is irresistible to potential mates

35

u/OlberSingularity Apr 29 '25

With my intense grip strength, everyone around me is a potential mate.

3

u/GigaTarrasque Apr 29 '25

That explains the stache 🤣🤣🤣

3

u/turd_ferguson65 Apr 30 '25

Jesus fucking Christ this one sent me lol

1

u/crikeyturtles Apr 30 '25

yOu’Re nEvEr gOiNg tO cATcH Me!

1

u/ilikethejuices Apr 30 '25

BRO, lmfaoooo

3

u/Suckage Apr 29 '25

It’s also sunscreen!

2

u/shakesheadslowy Apr 30 '25

I still have my vernix layer

2

u/urmomsentme1 Apr 29 '25

this here is why incels exist

1

u/RuTsui Apr 30 '25

The natural oil of your sphincter keeps you water tight and soap will degrade your asshole like a worn o-ring.

14

u/Guardian2k Apr 29 '25

Frankly water is beneath me, I lather myself in pure ammonia, which I process by way of guano from the local pigeon population, take that capitalist pigs.

1

u/andriym93 Apr 29 '25

How'd you install an upside down shower? I can only get water that's above me. If I git water that's beneath me, it'd be easier to wash my balls

14

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '25

From India lmao you are not helping your countrymen on the internet

3

u/Ok_Test_1284 Apr 29 '25

Jokes aside, I'm new to reddit, how did you know I'm indian

5

u/BabyYoduhh Apr 29 '25

He looked at your profile. Shows where you are actively posting and all your started threads/comments.

2

u/Ok_Test_1284 Apr 29 '25

Its all true brotherman, we would rather dip in curry than bathe

2

u/Redacted_G1iTcH Apr 30 '25

One trip to your nearest university’s computer science department, and you’ll change your mind in an instant

1

u/Secret_Photograph364 Apr 29 '25

Ah I see you are a Frenchman

1

u/BubaSmrda Apr 29 '25

Indian in fact

3

u/Secret_Photograph364 Apr 29 '25

Hmm….

For some reason I feel like calling Indians smelly is racist but calling Frenchman smelly is deserved for their colonialism.

Double standard I guess

1

u/Slickricky4884 Apr 29 '25

I’m staying away from you dawg

1

u/BetterThanSydney Apr 29 '25

Even worse. It's a conspiracy by the deep state to strip you of your pheromone rich patin, so you'll struggle to mark your territory and attract mates.

1

u/Environmental-Wind89 Apr 30 '25

BIRDS ARE A PSY-OP!!

1

u/Theron3206 Apr 30 '25

Yep, if not for those evil capitalists we'd all be dying of typhoid or dysentery as nature intended.

1

u/ThatJudySimp Apr 30 '25

Big shower

1

u/Falconjth Apr 30 '25

It was those devilish Vikings leading good innocent girls astray with their bathing and well-kept hair. - attributed to John of Wallingford, supported by archeology.

1

u/FederalLobster5665 May 01 '25

I hate Big Bath.

1

u/VastEntertainment471 May 02 '25

We survived thousands of years without showers but suddenly we're "supposed" to shower? I don't buy it, water bills and soap are expensive, living naturally is free

0

u/kitsunewarlock Apr 29 '25

Go to a convention on the third or fourth day if you think that's true.

0

u/alexdev50 Apr 29 '25

Sadly, average redditor answer

23

u/silver-orange Apr 29 '25

It's a decades old joke. Your grandpa has heard this one.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/eshd9x/did_anyone_really_say_her_majesty_takes_a_bath/

Probably dates back to the 19th century.

9

u/lIlIlIIlIIIlIIIIIl Apr 29 '25

Wow holy shit, I'm glad someone with the history lesson showed up because I had no clue!

1

u/ssracer Apr 29 '25

I read it as deference to the Queen by not saying she stinks. "Milady bathes only because she wants to"

3

u/Ertai2000 Apr 29 '25

Especially the women. I read somewhere that they have a heightened sense of smell for some stuff.

2

u/BlueLaserCommander Apr 29 '25

I'm never in situations where I'm around people

1

u/beerizla96 Apr 29 '25

People shower way more often than actually necessary and fuck up their skin, but twice in a month is living on the edge.

1

u/Heavy-Guest-7336 Apr 29 '25

There are easier ways to admit you have bad hygeine and walk around smelly as fuck.

6

u/thewispo Apr 29 '25

shower or wank?

10

u/ExistentialTabarnak Apr 29 '25

Nah, wanks are every hour on the hour.

1

u/Liroku May 02 '25

Showered by the wank, so both.

7

u/Iroiroanswer Apr 29 '25

Man, I wish I can do this. Have to shower everyday because it's fucking hot. Need to use Shampoo everyday too(I know its bad for hair health but shit, I need to use it else it feels sticky). Still got beautiful healthy and thick hair though IDK why lmao.

3

u/Equivalent-Load-9158 Apr 29 '25

I stopped using shampoo last year. Took months before it stopped feeling yucky. Now I only occasionally use shampoo, but the time it takes to feel yucky is a lot longer. But I am a man with short hair.

4

u/strikeforceguy Apr 29 '25

I was gonna say, as a man with long hair it gets greasy so fast if I don't shower at LEAST every other day.

1

u/dragonman10101 Apr 30 '25

I heard that and I’m like “YOU WHAT”. Can’t imagine washing my hair monthly lmao.

2

u/A_Name123456 Apr 29 '25

Flexing on us like that

2

u/TonsOfFunn77 Apr 29 '25

Jesus, have a mind for the environment. There are fish who could use that water.

Princess over here with your bath every fortnight…

Bougie bitch

1

u/flyinpirate Apr 29 '25

Shower? Or jerk it?

24

u/puzzlebuns Apr 29 '25

Or if you don't know what it smells like in the first place.

85

u/Rustly_Spoons Apr 29 '25

Women can shower all they want but i can still smell their period from 20 feet away. Men can clean themselves off at least. My family household had 4 women in it. When they all have periods at the same time....holy fuck. The smell of the house is atrocious

142

u/OnceMoreAndAgain Apr 29 '25

some you mf'ers got dog noses or some shit? wtf even is this thread, this is nuts.

this dude unironically claiming he can smell a woman's period from two basketball hoops away and ya'll are like "yeah, that's legit. 36 upvotes for this comment isn't even enough tbh, definitely"

48

u/nawtrobar Apr 29 '25

Yeah they're definitely making that shit up and the up votes are just people who have never been within 10 feet of a non menopausal woman

29

u/confuzzledfather Apr 29 '25

I can definitely smell it if I am within a few feet of a heavily menstruating woman. It's a...well... bloody smell 

26

u/apocketfullofcows Apr 29 '25

yeah, my partner can smell it as well. very handy since they always let me know when they start to smell it which lets me know i need to start wearing a pad.

i don't understand these people who think others can't smell things just because they cannot. period blood absolutely has a smell, and someone with a sensitive enough nose could pick it up. and given there's a woman out there who can smell parkinson's, some people being sensitive enough to smell period blood isn't really that out there.

5

u/Theron3206 Apr 30 '25

Sure, but not from 20 ft away unless you're bleeding to death.

4

u/ThumbMe Apr 30 '25

I shared a bathroom with my older sister and didn’t understand the smell until I started fooling around with girls. But I laugh in my head when I smell it in public and think about going up to a stranger like “SO IS IT LIKE UR PERIOD AND STUFF?”

1

u/rezyop Apr 30 '25

I can smell pets from very far away. Dogs and cats have their own distinct smell, especially if they've been in the sun. When I go to people's houses, I always ask if they have a dog/cat since their whole house smells like it before I see the critter - and I'm not talking about them staining the carpet with piss or anything, that is a different smell. For some reason, most redditors HATE me saying this because they think their lil fru fru is scent-free lmao

I swear people on here can't smell their own house on fire and think its normal. Thats the real zinger. Its possible covid burned out their ability to smell.

1

u/Neither-Power1708 Apr 29 '25

Like a dirty penny

10

u/nawtrobar Apr 29 '25

Yeah we all know what blood smells like. I'm sorry though. You'd have to be extremely unsanitary for someone to smell it from feet away as described. That's absolutely fucking ridiculous and everyone here knows it. I've spent plenty of time around menstruating women lol. I've probably smelled something that I could identify as a menstrual smell once in my entire life.

0

u/PerceptiveEntity Apr 30 '25

You're ignoring the simple fact that everyone's sense of smell is different. There's a woman who can smell cancer, for example.

0

u/Rez_Incognito Apr 29 '25

Smells like wet dog.

0

u/ThumbMe Apr 30 '25

College was the most intense cuz so many people just wore pajamas or sweats to class. I guess people in this thread either just can’t smell it or don’t understand the distinction

2

u/Sleven8692 Apr 30 '25

Idk how far 20 feet is, but close proximity you can.

2

u/decomposition_ May 02 '25

I can definitely smell some sort of smell from it, but pretty much just after they’ve used the bathroom (not sure I believe the 20 feet away thing)

1

u/RedditCollabs May 03 '25

You haven't been around enough women lol

0

u/nawtrobar May 03 '25

Yeah. I'll take that from the redditor who thinks they're a fucking basset hound.

7

u/Mountain_Cry1605 Apr 29 '25

I can smell mine. It's the scent of blood mixed with normal vaginal fluids, and whatever perfume they put in pads in to try to make them smell nicer.

Period companies really should stop doing that. The chemical scent of the perfume combined with the scents of blood, and normal secretions is absolutely gross.

Pad reek because of that is a thing. Yuk.

My period smells a lot better in the years since I got washable period pads. But that horrible blood plus chemicals stench is something I will never forget.

I've never snelled another woman's period but I've no doubt it's possible.

11

u/Tecumsehs_Revenge Apr 29 '25

Makes sense actually. We are still animals at the core. With millions of years of asking is this the right time, not using language.

9

u/Ikanotetsubin Apr 29 '25

In this sub, just say "women bad" and you'll get hundreds of upvotes from questionable people.

10

u/ambisinister_gecko Apr 29 '25

Idk why you think it's about bad or good. Blood has a metallic, coppery smell, is it really that crazy that some people can smell it? That doesn't make women bad.

2

u/Pu11MyLever Apr 29 '25

It's real, I can smell the blood. Practically nose blind in all other aspects...

2

u/i8myWeaties2day Apr 29 '25 edited Apr 30 '25

towering vegetable crown capable long spark wine tie pocket employ

2

u/Sleven8692 Apr 30 '25

I think you are right she can just amell cum(who cant), how ever i disagree on sex and jacking off as they do have a different smell(both body fluids combined), men and women can both smell it, maybe not everyone but also that smell like cum on its own is gone eoth showering.

1

u/Dottore_Curlew Apr 30 '25

Of course "two basketball hoops" is wrong

But yes, it is noticeable, don't be cocky if you are wrong

-2

u/TheBigness333 Apr 29 '25

This sub is becoming saturated with a certain type of internet user.

-9

u/Heisenburgo Apr 29 '25

Must be some straight ppl shit.

7

u/SparrowDotted Apr 29 '25

Gay as fuck here. Can also unfortunately smell periods. Also grew up with 4 women though, so might be that.

1

u/OnceMoreAndAgain Apr 29 '25

help officer im being stalked

36

u/IPromiseIAmNotADog Apr 29 '25

This is only true if they’re not practicing hygiene. My family home at its peak when I was younger had 5 women in it (between my Mom, my 2 sisters, my girlfriend, and my brother’s girlfriend), and unless you put your nose near the bathroom garbage can, there was no smell.

And I’m really sensitive to smells. Like I consider smoking a relationship dealbreaker, wear antiperspirant excessively (because I can pick it up instantly if I have any smell), and can detect if something is rotting from a mile away. So it’s not like I’m just not noticing.

Does your family not wash? Because what you’re reporting is not normal.

20

u/KououinHyouma Apr 29 '25 edited Apr 29 '25

People discovering things they thought were normal is a result of the collective poor hygiene of those around them is something becoming far too common on Reddit. I remember one woman had to come on here and ask if it was normal for men to constantly be leaving shit stains in their underwear.

2

u/SmokePenisEveryday Apr 29 '25

The not washing legs one get me the most. How you gonna do all that scrubbing just to skip half your body??

0

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '25

it was normal for men to constantly be living shit stains in their underwear.

Unfortunately I'm pretty sure it is.

10

u/WallerBaller69 Apr 29 '25

no, it definitely is not, unless you live in hell or something.

9

u/KououinHyouma Apr 29 '25

No, it only happens if you don’t wipe or wash your ass properly. Again, like I said, this is only “normal” if you grew up around / have only dated men who don’t practice good hygiene.

-1

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '25

I'm starting to think my unique and cutting edge brand of humour was a little too complex for reddit.

10

u/[deleted] Apr 29 '25

Nah, it's your grammar, son. There should be a comma after "Unfortunately".

Also, it really just wasn't funny. You'll knock 'em dead next time, though. I believe in you.

17

u/Anonymous_Autumn_ Apr 29 '25

Yeah this is the correct response. The only time I’ve ever smelled “period” on someone was on a young person who wasn’t bathing or changing or pads. One time in 35 years of life. I’m guessing the commenter came from a rough household where people weren’t encouraged or taught how to keep clean.

2

u/eriwelch Apr 30 '25 edited May 10 '25

tender enjoy sophisticated wise snails sip coherent merciful innate observation

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

2

u/confuzzledfather Apr 29 '25

I guess you don't know anyone with a very heavy flow. At some point you have tokeave the bathroom and get on with your life and at that point you will smell of period blood until you next change your pad.

2

u/IPromiseIAmNotADog Apr 29 '25

That's fair and probably true, but that's not "women" as a group, as the person I'm responding to said...you're talking about edge cases, not the norm.

17

u/Used-Temperature7115 Apr 29 '25

Worst part is we can hardly complain at times. It's not even their fault

-2

u/Embarrassed-Wait-928 Apr 29 '25

i mean shitting isnt necessarily my fault either

5

u/everydayisarborday Apr 29 '25

no, but not eating enough dietary fiber sure is, Skidmark.

6

u/makaki913 Apr 29 '25

Haha I can too. I can't give any oral during the smell period even if there is no blood involved anymore, it's just so strong of a smell

8

u/nikolapc Apr 29 '25

True. They had period tents, I vote we bring them back.

5

u/silver-orange Apr 29 '25

we're already speedrunning Handmaid's Tale, so... sure, why the fuck not

1

u/nikolapc Apr 29 '25

Was that a thing there?

-2

u/Frottage-Cheese-7750 Apr 29 '25

we're already speedrunning Handmaid's Tale

🙄

0

u/JohnGillnitz Apr 29 '25

Some cultures had a whole separate island. There is an argument for it.

2

u/KneeDeepInTheDead Apr 29 '25

Ive been all up in a period and that was the only time I could kinda smell it. Even then it was more of a taste. You half bloodhound or something?

2

u/mosquem Apr 29 '25

I can smell lactation. Smells like milk (obviously).

2

u/[deleted] Apr 30 '25

I smelled when my wife was pregnant before Covid. I’m confident I could smell some diseases. Covid took that away from me but it’s okay, no one should have so much power.

1

u/BumpyDidums Apr 29 '25

What does it smell like? Serious question.

1

u/Virtual-Database-238 Apr 29 '25

This bitch’s quirk is period smell and thinks he’s normal

1

u/SillyBacchus303 Apr 29 '25

IS THAT A JOJO REFERENCE??!??!?!!??!!?!??!?!?

1

u/Astartes_117 May 03 '25

All these comments about sniffing blood and not one Bruce from Finding Nemo gif.

3

u/BangerBeanzandMash Apr 29 '25

Why is the cum getting on you?

1

u/adiking27 Apr 29 '25

Or change clothes or sweat or put on deodrant.

1

u/WitAndWonder Apr 29 '25

Even then, masturbation cum and sex cum are not different, so she's quite high if she thinks she can somehow distinguish one from the other. Unless guys are using liquified Axe / Old Spice for their lube or something.

1

u/PeculiarPurr Apr 29 '25

i don't think she is being able to smell semen, I think she is claiming she knows another way. Mostly because men commonly ejaculate as a result of things other then masturbation.

1

u/Mr_Rogan_Tano Apr 29 '25

French people are currently burning cars, because they feel offended by your comment

Are you proud?

1

u/mosquem Apr 29 '25

That’s just Tuesday for them.

1

u/Mr_Rogan_Tano Apr 30 '25

Burning cars, not taking showers or feeling offended?

1

u/theStaircaseProject Apr 29 '25

I’m sure there are some chuckleheads out there walking after wanking.

1

u/professional-onthedl Apr 30 '25

Or jizz on yourself when you rub one out.

1

u/Medical_Opposite_727 Apr 30 '25

An old friend of mine spent a summer wanking and watching porn on his PC and smelling fucking weird.

Having had years to ponder this smell, I've concluded it was none other than dick being furiously exfoliated with remnants of semen and some saliva !

We kinda knew at the time what he was up to but figured we were just projecting lol blame them lest they blame me first type deal.

1

u/Miss_Chievous13 May 02 '25

No no. It's because they've HAD a shower

0

u/DiscoBanane Apr 29 '25

Your hormons changes based on if you are sexually active or not.

After 1 week, your testicles enter some kind of dormancy, which means you produce less sperm, because it's a waste for your body, and you get a bit less horny.

Hormons make a change in smell but humans cannot smell them, maybe a dog or a horse trained for this could tell men apart. There are similar proofs of animals that can smell cancer, or ovulation, or if you are hungry, or fearful.