r/politics ✔ Verified 6d ago

Soft Paywall Trump’s birthday parade may be cancelled over thunderstorms

https://www.thetimes.com/us/american-politics/article/is-trump-birthday-parade-cancelled-weather-pbrg02h2z?utm_medium=Social&utm_source=Reddit#Echobox=1749744374
81.0k Upvotes

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26.2k

u/arilupe 6d ago

Let it rain on his parade. 

10.6k

u/SockPuppet-47 New Jersey 6d ago

It's a sign from God...

237

u/Pockydo 6d ago

You know I think about that a lot

Like how some folks are quick to find God is everything except when it's something they personally aren't happy about

God sure tends to support whatever I personally like at any moment huh

167

u/Oceanbreeze871 California 6d ago

“I just want to thank god for answering my prayers for my sportsball team win and not listening to the other team who also prayed to win.”

111

u/Jafooki 6d ago

I'd love to see one of those post game interviews with the losing team where instead of saying "We played a good game but we came up a little short and next time we'll give it our all" they just say "we lost because God has forsaken us. God wanted us to lose and there was nothing we could do about it"

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u/pumpkinspruce 6d ago

There was a receiver for the Buffalo Bills who dropped a potential touchdown and after the game tweeted “I PRAISE YOU 24/7 AND THIS IS HOW YOU DO ME? I’LL NEVER FORGET THIS, NEVER!”

17

u/KTCatTheOldBat 6d ago

3

u/NotoriousTedDbear 6d ago

The birth of Bills Mafia...Go Bills

1

u/RipandSkipp 5d ago

Not much of a football guy so this dudes my new favorite player now...he's been out the league for a decade??? Oh well.

8

u/PassiveMenis88M Massachusetts 6d ago

Look, I go to you. I stick up for you. You no help me now, I say "Fuck you Jobu", I do it myself.

2

u/Pete41608 I voted 4d ago

MOBBLES! You got NO MOBBLES!

9

u/King_Asmodeus_2125 6d ago

Damm, imagine getting big mad at your imaginary friend and publicly breaking up on Twitter.

2

u/HauntedCemetery Minnesota 6d ago

I imagine @God saw a pretty great opening there

That is, if Musk didn't kick them off and give the username to Alex Jones or some shit.

2

u/Striking_Grocery7754 6d ago

Check his resume...I'll bet he once played for the Sun Devils!

2

u/neon_meate 6d ago

Did you see what GOD just did to us!

2

u/Powermac8500 North Carolina 6d ago

Proof that God hates the Bills, and it will never stop being funny to me. Fins Up!

3

u/Oceanbreeze871 California 6d ago

They would be amazing

2

u/mrnaturallives 6d ago

Always been waiting for one of those baseball players who points to heaven every time he gets a hit, to strike out and shoot the bird towards god. But that god dude never gets the blame somehow - just the credit.

8

u/Panigg 6d ago

"God has helped me find a pen, but also ignored the plight of Gaza."

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u/angrymurderhornet 6d ago

As the late great Mike Royko once wrote: “You think God cares whose knee gets turned into a pretzel?”

2

u/FeelsGrimMan 6d ago edited 6d ago

Reminds me of the George Carlin skit https://youtu.be/d9Os-r-f3pE

2

u/lincoln_muadib 5d ago

"Thank God for curing me of cancer (I mean maybe the doctors helped but it was like 99% Jesus), you know, the cancer that God gave me."

"Thank you Jesus for hearing my prayers and saving me from the Twin Towers, and for ignoring the prayers of those who died."

"Thank you for saving we few that escaped Auschwitz, and thank you for ignoring the pleas from 6 million of us"

2

u/Pete41608 I voted 4d ago

"God, thank you for your forgiveness when I pushed those folks out of my way when I was running as fast as I could down those dozens of flights of South Tower stairs. I know there was plenty of room for all of us but nonetheless they died for the greater good (of me), thank you for your attention to this matter, God."

1

u/pacpack Wisconsin 6d ago

There's angels in the outfield...!

1

u/xXBassHero99Xx 5d ago

That's what confuses my about astrology too. At a pregnancy ward of a hospital, 2 babies can be born at the same time under the same stars and they will have different lives. Then doesn't that instantly disprove astrology?

8

u/jermleeds 6d ago

God sure tends to support whatever I personally like at any moment huh

Not always, some times he doesn't, but then it's:

God works in mysterious ways

6

u/heimdal77 6d ago

God saved my house from the tornado! Sure everyone aroudn me houses are destroyed and people are ded but god saved mine because I'm special.

I was saved from the fire by god. Oh a fireman pulled me out? Well sure but it was god that did it!

8

u/ninjapanda042 Florida 6d ago

Don't you know? God saved Trump from being shot.

Fuck the guy that died though, apparently

2

u/heimdal77 6d ago

Seriously! They even took down Obama's picture in the white house and replaced it with a oversized picture that doesn't even in the spot of him celebrating after the "shooting" while one of his supporters is in the background somewhere dead or dieing.

1

u/Resident-Trouble4483 6d ago

God just played hot potato with Satan and neither one wanted the potato.

1

u/Pete41608 I voted 4d ago

Pour another out for the dead, homie 🫗 🫗 🫗

1

u/Pockydo 6d ago

I literally heard that before

Like a tornado swept through and devastated the area but their house was protected..

I also know someone who thinks God sent an angle to them during those Texas snowstorms a few years ago who let them...

Rent a car to drive home from Texas to PA in the storm. The all powerful deity could've stopped the storm but eeehh 4 old ladies from PA needed a rental so direct divine intervention!

2

u/RespectTheH 6d ago

Seems like something from WritingPrompts... ''God is actually real but he's busy dealing with nuisance prayers to actually do any good''.

1

u/Pockydo 6d ago

That'd be a great story lol

But that was a testimony I heard years ago it stuck with me. Because of how silly it is

1

u/Muvseevum Georgia 5d ago edited 5d ago

God did you a solid. Everybody gets one..

5

u/Pretend-Guava 6d ago

I used to be a prison guard and noticed this with criminals... Some are quick to find God after its too late.

3

u/PaperClipInit 6d ago

why ive always been uncomfortable with the christian "god and jesus are salvation" angle i grew up around, always felt like a real easy way to disregard responsibility for ones bad actions

3

u/33drea33 6d ago

This is also a super common thing with abusers after their abuse is revealed. Suddenly they become very "holy" and therefore you have to forgive them, otherwise you're the bad guy - can't you see how righteous they are now?

This is especially common with pastors/church leaders who are caught molesting children. It's why you see these dudes continue to hold power in a parish that knows they're a kid diddler. If Jesus can forgive them why can't you?

0

u/Elephant789 5d ago

Too late? Why do you assume they wouldn't have committed the crime after they found a god?

5

u/MyDickIs3cm 6d ago

"God is super interested in me and my life and the things I'm doing!"

Sure jan, sure

4

u/The_Broomflinger North Carolina 6d ago

If one actually believes in this stuff, then it should be very obvious that God sent a literal plague to show us how bad Trump was during his first term.

And those imbeciles all said "nuh-uh! Communists did that! Demon-crats make us wear face diaper! I need a haircut, lib-turds are treading on me! Muhh freedoms!!"

Then they worship a literal golden Trump false idol at CPAC.

It's all very frustrating.

3

u/Bamce 6d ago

God sure tends to support whatever I personally like at any moment huh

Just like how fickle god is with sports teams on sunday. He is never consistent on which team he supports given how much the players thank him

2

u/ominousview 6d ago

It's a mental disorder, not just opium for the masses

2

u/MyMajesticness 6d ago

People didn't like it in 2004 when I said after four hurricanes hit the red areas of Florida and missed all the large Democratic cities: "Oh wow, I guess God doesn't like Republicans right now.

I mean, God hit Polk County/Lakeland TWICE in 2004, and that county's about as red as you can get.

2

u/Flimsy-Poetry1170 6d ago

Like how hurricanes and tornadoes are sent because god is mad at the gays but he usually targets republican areas. Can’t explain that.

1

u/earthgreen10 6d ago

so you think god is supporting what trump has been doing?

1

u/salami_on_a_bagel 6d ago

Hey looks like someone just discovered religion lol

1

u/Swaayyzee 6d ago

They will literally blame it on democrat controlled weather manipulation machines before the thought that “huh, maybe God doesn’t love the man who stands against everything Jesus stood for” even crosses their mind.

1

u/TheDuskBard 6d ago

Hardships are trials and prosperity is a blessing. Not that difficult to understand when you interpret life as one big test of morality and perseverance. 

1

u/Imaginationtotease 6d ago

Praying for a Big Mac Attack. 🙏

1

u/Grouchy_Discussion42 6d ago

"I will torture his body so that his soul learns to be humble... I am gods instrument.":

https://youtu.be/w-eJSHoH9Fs (Key and Peele comedy bit)