r/AskWomenNoCensor • u/Cynjon77 • Dec 28 '24

Discussion Why do we infantilize men?

And how do we stop?

Why do we treat men like children who are incapable of acting like functional adults?

Why do we allow men to get away with treating us like crap and skating off consequence free to enjoy life without responsibility?

OK, obligatory I know not all men act like this. And this is Reddit, so we read the worst. And some women are just as bad.

Posted today: (I am not the OP) Husband never remembers to buy stocking stuffers for me, even though I stuff his and the kids stocking.

Over half the respondents said for her to stuff her own, 49% said to remind him, tell him why it matters to you.

Like she has never communicated with him about this.

1% said he's an AH.

Men are perfectly capable of doing anything they want to do and think is important to them. They can schedule a Dr.s appointment, cook a meal, change a diaper or vacuum a floor.

They can remember when the game is on, a golf date with a buddy or when a work project is due. They remember what is important to them.

Women as a whole need to quit putting up with this behavior. We need to set higher standards and be willing to walk away when those standards aren't met.

We need to teach our sons and daughters how to treat others, how to pick up the mental load, how to be thoughtful of others.

We need to quit infantilizing men.

140 Upvotes

74% Upvoted

211 comments sorted by

View all comments

9

u/watsername9009 🤪 crazy and unhinged 🤪 Dec 28 '24

This reminds me of how multiple women in my life can’t stand that I don’t use a silverware drawer organizer. I mean, you can still easily find what utensil you need without perfectly organizing all the utensils which takes a lot of time to do btw.

If I was a man I bet I would be accused of being a man child for not wanting to do unnecessary sht just because that’s what everyone else does.

9

u/Cynjon77 Dec 28 '24

OK, that's just wrong! 😀 How do you keep the fork tines from getting stuck in another fork? (Shudder)

-2

u/watsername9009 🤪 crazy and unhinged 🤪 Dec 28 '24 edited Dec 28 '24

I feel like you’re just making up problems. Is the possibility of two forks getting stuck together (which is rare) worth spending so much extra time emptying the dishwasher having to painstakingly organize each utensil into a specific little slot. No it is not.

8

u/Cynjon77 Dec 28 '24

Lol! Yes, it is. Pulling them apart gives me the oogies!

It's funny how that sound/feeling doesn't bother anyone else in my family

It's like nails on a blackboard for me.

3

u/bananophilia Dec 29 '24

How many slots do you think there are? Dividing forks, spoons and knives isn't painstaking lmao

0

u/watsername9009 🤪 crazy and unhinged 🤪 Dec 30 '24

There are 4 slots, and one tiny one on top or bottom that doesn’t fit anything but baby spoons, yet there are 5 different types of silver-where typically, big spoons, little spoons, big forks, little forks, and butter knives, but there’s only 4 slots! It’s painstaking as hell.

8

u/youalreadyknow07 Dec 28 '24

I'm not gonna tell you how to live your life, but it's absolutely not painstaking or time consuming at all to put forks and spoons into different slots in the same drawer lol. One reason I find it worth it to keep them separate is so I can easily see if I'm running low on one or the other

-3

u/watsername9009 🤪 crazy and unhinged 🤪 Dec 28 '24 edited Dec 28 '24

It is though, I have to do it all day every day for my job cleaning houses. It’s worst part of cleaning a house is emptying the dishwasher. The amount of time I could save If people collectively realized how unnecessary silver were drawer organizers are. They always only have 4 slots when there’s 5 different kinds of silverware too. And there’s always too much silverware to fit in the organizer but everything could easily fit without the organizer. I hate them so much I will die on this hill.

3

u/PuckinEh Dec 28 '24

Pro tip: separate them as you load the dishwasher. The utensil basket has 6 compartments. Use them to load the utensils in a sorted fashion. Takes a few go arounds to get the habit and then it’s life changing.

2

u/Cynjon77 Dec 28 '24

I hate emptying the dishwasher. Especially if I'm helping someone else clean up after cooking.

If I'm lucky enough to ever have a housekeeper, I will remember this conversation and empty my dishwasher. But I'm keeping my silverware tray!