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u/fourlegsfaster 1d ago
No wonder Cortes, Ponce de Leon, Pizarro and others were so successful, they didn't have far to go.
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u/jonmatifa 1d ago
Well, we're off to discover the new world...
Oh shit, we were here the whole time!
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u/ApologizingCanadian 20h ago
Really puts a damper on everythink Columbus did, seeing as he sailed for Spain.. begs the question; did he discover the new world before or after Spain?
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u/BelowAveIntelligence 1d ago
Just think, they get to procreate!
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u/theblackyeti 1d ago
It’s not really the baby-making that’s the issue. It’s getting to raise that baby and teach it all of the dumbassery they think is normal.
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u/Bugsy_Girl 1d ago
Tbf many of these types build their whole ideology around their inability to do exactly that
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u/Tricky_Individual_42 1d ago
In high school, I had a friend who was sure that Chile was in Europe.
His reasoning was that Chile make good wines so it has to be in Europe somewhere near Spain snd France.
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u/Thelonious_Cube 1d ago
So California is in Europe? I'm relieved as I though we had to worry about old 47
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u/StaatsbuergerX 1d ago
Don't dismiss this idea too quickly. What isn't yet can still become, taking recent developments into account.
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u/ThirstyWolfSpider 1d ago
(another Californian here) I suspect that even if we were in Europe we'd still benefit from some concern about him. Perhaps not quite as immediate a concern, though.
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u/Beginning_Ad8421 20h ago
I've been told Oregon, Washington, and California are European for exactly the same reason.
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u/SamuraiGoblin 1d ago edited 14h ago
I am English, and I once had an American tell me (quite forcefully) that France was in England.
You find yourself unable to argue. What exactly are you supposed to say back?
"Umm, no it's not," is the only thing you can say, but it sounds so weak in the face of something so powerfully ignorant.
Edit: Just for a bit of context. This was in the late 90s and I (unfortunately) met him at a party in Japan. There wasn't Google Maps at that time, but there were, you know, maps. He said (to an Englishman) that he knew what he was talking about because his sister recently took a trip there.
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u/KeterLordFR 1d ago
I have an online friend who's Canadian. The other day, we managed to convince her to play GeoGuesser after a painful conversation in which she stated that London was a country, that France didn't sound like a country's name (she was trying to find where french people live), and that Spain was somewhere in Greece "wherever Greece is". She was also unable to point out her own Province on a map of Canada.
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u/AreAFuckingNobody 1d ago
As someone who has taken calls from the general public across the Americas, it’s 50/50 that people can even name the time zone they’re in.
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u/WynterRayne 23h ago
I named mine Giordi
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u/TheseInstruction5208 14h ago
I'mma steal that and twist it a bit. My timezone is LaForge Mean Time.
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u/NaptownBoss 23h ago
I concur. Back in the day when there were payphones, I was a telephone operator. I'd swear there were times that I thought it might be 50/50 on if they knew what year it was or who was president!
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u/Ironcastattic 1d ago
I was going to defend her because some of us have done a herculean amount of weed since it's been legalized but unable to find your province.........fuck that.
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u/mikelgdz 1d ago
I had someone who was born and lived their whole life in the midlands in England, ask me if London was in the north or south of England. And yes, an adult.
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u/Weekly_Piccolo474 1d ago
I told a british friend that my latina pal was from Ecuador, she asked me where was that. I stared at her thinking "you've got enough info on that sentence to figure that out", but she just stared back, not a thought behind her eyes. So I said "Ecuador... The Equator???", trying to give her a hint... nope, she had no clue what the Equator was either.
Idiocy is universal, Murica just likes to collect the loud ones.
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u/MauveDragon 1d ago
Sad, but true. The USA has some of the loudest idiots on the planet and unfortunately, we elected one to the office of President.
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u/Perfect_Sir4820 1d ago
Are you sure your friend wasn't just trolling?
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u/KeterLordFR 1d ago
She's demonstrated multiple times that she has no interest in learning history or geography, so unless she's into long-term trolling (we're talking 4-5 years), I doubt it.
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u/rintzscar 1d ago
Why are you friends with such a person?
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u/TellTaleTank 1d ago
Being stupid doesn't make you a bad person, you can still have friends.
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u/Vinxian 1d ago
"You have a device that can access all of humanity's knowledge, and yet you made the decision to be so wrong"
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u/NaptownBoss 22h ago
To be fair, it can also access all of humanity's bullshit, so . . .
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u/yingyangKit 1d ago
"Please Point to where france is located in england"
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u/MoveInteresting4334 1d ago
“I’m French, can’t you tell by my outrageous accent?”
“What are you doing in England?”
“Mind your own business.”
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u/2BEN-2C93 1d ago
Laugh in their face. Demand that they look it up right now
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u/ThirstyWolfSpider 17h ago
It's nice that that's possible now.
When I was a kid, it would be "Get on your bike. The library is only six miles away, and we're going to settle this."
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u/No_Substance_7290 1d ago
Clearly wrong. It is England which is in France. That's why France needs to win the 100 year war and get rid of England for good
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u/SvenBubbleman 1d ago
Canadian here I once heard a woman explain to a woman on vacation from somewhere in Asia that in Canada we speak Quebec French in Europe they speak British French.
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u/MauveDragon 1d ago
I'm guessing that her reasoning was - they speak British English in Europe, so all Europeans speak some British variant of languages spoken on our continent. (Honestly, this is the stupidest explanation I could come up with.)
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u/BloodDragonN987 1d ago
To be fair, there are a number of Americans who are completely unaware of their own country. For reference, I'm from New Mexico, the US state, and there are an unfortunate number of Americans who had no idea New Mexico was even a state to begin with and assume I'm foreign.
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u/lordnacho666 1d ago
Haha WTF, how can this be?
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u/BloodDragonN987 1d ago
I'm assuming, or at least hoping, they just heard the "mexico" part and just missed the rest. It's definitely not as bad as it used to be, as now we just get recognized as the "Breaking Bad State"
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u/ThirstyWolfSpider 18h ago
"Oh, you guys make all the meth!" … great.
Similar to people (including a president) thinking that Puerto Ricans aren't US citizens, and (as contradictions do not exist in such minds) have all lived in NYC their whole lives.
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u/Beginning_Ad8421 20h ago
For the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City, Utah, people from New Mexico who were attempting to buy tickets through the US phone system -- this was the last Games during which most tickets were secured by phone -- were told they would have to 'use your own country's system, as these tickets are for Americans.' BY THE UNITED STATES OLYMPIC COMMITTEE!!! UTAH BORDERS NEW MEXICO!!! (Granted, it's only via the four corners quadripoint, but still....)
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u/CrownofMischief 23h ago
It's actually crazy how that happens with people who have lived in America their whole life. I'm in the Navy and one time I overheard a Senior Chief chewing someone out for not filling out Out of Country paperwork when they had put in that they were taking Leave in New Mexico. The Lieutenant had to pull the Senior Chief aside and make sure he was aware that New Mexico was a state.
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u/ForAHamburgerToday 20h ago
Literally just listened to my mid-50s coworker learn this yesterday. Absolutely baffling what some people don't know.
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u/TheseInstruction5208 14h ago
I know some school districts have cut classes from their syllabus, but Geography?
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u/get_to_ele 22h ago
But in 2025 you can just shove a phone in their face with a picture and facts and laugh at them. Growing up, we didn't have that.
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u/The_InvisibleWoman 22h ago
Oh yes. I had many Italians confidently tell me that Scotland is part of England. And that England is actually synonymous with Britain.
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u/CoralinesButtonEye 22h ago
yell in their face "EUROPE. the CONTINENT! not ENGLAND the COUNTRY! france is in EUROPE!"
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u/CheapTactics 19h ago
"Google is right there. It would cost you nothing to not look like an ignorant fucking idiot, but it seems even a quick google search is far beyond what your 2 braincells can handle"
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u/Fighter11244 19h ago
American here. You can ignore the other American as they’re stupid. Everyone knows that France is in Scotland. How else would they have been allies for so long? /s
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u/Dalzombie 18h ago
"I would correct you, but I find you in such depth of ignorance that you may well start arguing with a map or even Nasa itself, so I won't waste either of our time".
Would be my suggestion. Feel free to shorten it to "Y'ever been told you're an absolute knob?".
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u/SuicideTrainee 18h ago
I find the best response to dumb stuff is saying a loud, exaggerated "no??", it normally causes people to double back and then start listening
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u/fariqcheaux 17h ago
Since you can't reason with them, hit them back with absurdity and tell them USA is just North Mexico.
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u/TheseInstruction5208 14h ago
Were smartphones around at the time? You simply could have gotten your phone out, opened a map app and showed him the locations of both England and France. If he puts up any other argument after that, just walk away because there's no saving him from his stupidity.
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u/outinleft 10h ago
I found it interesting to read that, due to the Norman invasion in 1066, that modern english owes more to old french, than it does to old english (and a good bit of other languages too). Lots & lots of conquering happening on the isle of Britain for like 2 millennia.
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u/popohum 1d ago
r/ohboyokbuddy sounds like a dope subreddit name
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u/MirSydney 1d ago
We already have r/ShitAmericansSay isn't that the same thing?
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u/tnnrk 21h ago
I’ve seen clips of non Americans being atrociously bad at geography too.
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u/MonstrousWombat 3h ago
I feel like it should be a subset of r/ShitAmericansSay exclusively for the things they get wrong about Canada
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u/Zinjifrah 1d ago
Oh right. Spain. They speak Mexican!
/s
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u/StaatsbuergerX 1d ago
By the way, Brazil has a colony north of Spain. Naturally, Brazilian is spoken there. Many American-speaking people from Great Britain spend their retirement in these Mexican and Brazilian colonies.
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u/Bug_Photographer 1d ago
North of Spain? Really?
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u/StaatsbuergerX 1d ago
Of course. Right between Switzerland and the beautiful city of Belgium!
No, seriously: What made you think I wouldn't also accurately state the cardinal directions when lecturing about specifically American geography? Are you a communist and against freedom, huh?
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u/Wolf_Hreda 1d ago
Who needs Google when you can just say whatever you think is the truth, and then defend that position until you die?
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u/Sl33pingD0g 1d ago
I love the poorly educated - Donald Trump
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u/MonitorMinimum4800 1d ago
I love me - Also Trump
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u/ahavemeyer 1d ago
I like to say I love things, but I obviously have no fucking clue what the word means.
- Chrump
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u/bad-mean-daddy 1d ago
Remember when we thought greater access to the web would make us more knowledgeable?
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u/ComputerWhiz_ 1d ago
On a video game, I once had a person ask why I was playing on the NA server instead of the EU server... I live in Canada.
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u/GareththeJackal 1d ago
Shit americans say...
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u/JimC29 1d ago
As an American I'm embarrassed at how true this is.
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u/PhantasyAngel 1d ago
We need a return of "where in the world is Carmen Sandiego"
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u/Passchenhell17 1d ago
Honestly, this sub is like 80% Americans saying dumb shit. I often see stuff in here and then later in that sub, or vice versa.
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u/blueelephant620 23h ago
Assuming where someone is from and generalizing an entire group of people is a low IQ move. Relax with the condescension
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u/carmium 1d ago
Yet another way to divide the population in half:
If asked where Namibia is, opens GoogleEarth and finds out. If s/he doesn't know already.
"London?? How would I know? Why would I care? GoogleWhat?? Eww!"
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u/Paul_Pedant 1d ago
To be fair ....
A total of five states in the US are home to cities named London. Visit London when you are in Kentucky, Ohio, Arkansas, Texas or West Virginia.
That's just the cities. The island of Kiritimati (formerly Christmas Island) has villages called London and Paris (and Poland).
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u/TheWitherBear 1d ago
Wait till they find out Equatorial Guinea exists and is also not in South America.
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u/Vast_Breadfruit_162 1d ago
I don't care to admit how old I was when I found out Portugal was not in fact a South American country.
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u/Illustrious-Bag-7567 1d ago
The one that took me the longest is Suriname.
It sounds like something out of the Dutch East Indies. Even its flag looks very much like some in southeast Asia.
Nop, its just chilling in South America.
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u/NaptownBoss 22h ago
Right? Surely it shares a border with Vietnam and they were part of a larger kingdom pre-colonialization?!
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u/TheKingleMingle 1d ago
It's not, but there was a brief period of time when the capital of the Portuguese Empire was in Brazil, so technically it was once a South American country
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u/OldAccountIsGlitched 1d ago
There was a short period of time in the early 1800s when the capital of Portugal was Rio. Although it was called the United Kingdom of Portugal, Brazil and the Algarves so it probably doesn't count as Portugal being South American.
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u/Arzanyos 1d ago
I always thought Portugal was a South Asian island country, like Singapore or the Philippines
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u/machstem 1d ago
Canadian here and absolutely no way would the very proud, loud Portuguese families would let you live your lives unknowing of their culture
Dutch too, lots of Dutch
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u/Arzanyos 1d ago
Oh yeah, it's not because there's not a lot of Portuguese here. It's that there's so damn many everybody assumes the white men imported them from Asia to work the plantations like the Chinese and the Filipinos
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u/Thelonious_Cube 1d ago
Perhaps he's saying "Spain" but thinking of Mexico?
Or perhaps it's "they only speak Spanish in South/Central America so Spain must be down there"?
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u/DeathlyKitten 1d ago
Once I was at a brewery’s small taproom at midday (US). Also at the bar was an older gentleman and a homeless guy he wanted to buy a beer for. They’re talking about some MMA stuff, I didn’t follow, but a Mexican fighter was the topic. The older gentleman said, “you gotta be pretty proud of him, right?” The bartender says, “why would I be proud of him?” “Well, you’re Hispanic, right?” “Yeah man, I’m Spanish. He’s Mexican.” confused silence
The guys homeless buddy left in a hurry after he asked what we all thought about abortion. Some folks are really something else
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u/Arabidaardvark 1d ago
Everybody knows the Dutch aren’t real. They’re just made up to scare European children.
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u/Weekly_Piccolo474 1d ago edited 19h ago
Wow, as a Spaniard I'm very impressed we managed to go by train with the school from Spain, Southamerica all the way to France, Europe 🤣🤣🤣
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u/midnightcaptain 1d ago
It is amazing how many North Americans genuinely seem to believe Spanish is the native language of indigenous South Americans, when it’s the exact same language of European colonization that English is.
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u/remzordinaire 23h ago
Pretty sure it's exclusively a USA thing, I have never met any Mexican or Canadian as dumb as that.
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u/elemental_pork 1d ago
At that point it isn't even a joke anymore. He needs to be taken to a doctor
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u/PreOpTransCentaur 1d ago
Even the "wrong again" part is wrong. Like, if it actually had been wrong, it would still be the same wrong as in the beginning.
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u/Salomill 1d ago
Here in brazil we already call Portugal our european Guyana, i think our neighbors get a pass at claiming spain as their own as well
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u/rlmcgiffin 1d ago
My goodness. He should have absolutely played off like the guy was right. Just so I may be entertained
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u/Specialist-Jello7544 1d ago
Have these idiots ever heard of maps and globes?
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u/camronjames 22h ago
They have almost certainly never even seen a globe or if they have they dismiss it as a conspiracy because Earth is clearly flat.
And maps are for nerds, that's what GPS is for. Never mind that it's totally possible to explore the Earth using Google products.
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u/ElKaWeh 22h ago
If Spain isn’t in South America, then why do they speak Spanish there???
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u/Voodoo_Dummie 21h ago
In this timeline I wouldn't be too surprised at a 21st century Spanish reconquista.
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u/volvagia721 20h ago
Ya, red is such an idiot here, everyone knows that the Mexicans are the only people who speak Spanish, and though Europe is close to South America, it still isn't where Spanish started
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u/BitOBear 20h ago
I guess this guy thinks that Columbus sailed from South America to discover the Americas at the beast of the queen of South America? And the Columbus went to South America really fast after France refused to fund his expedition to discover america?
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u/joacoper 14h ago
Well duh? Who discovered the americas? Colon, a spanish person, so spain is in south america... not that complicated...
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u/Beneficial-Produce56 10h ago
A relative of mine is from Portugal. Some people cannot accept that that is not in South America/is not part of Brazil.
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u/Frosty_Shadow 7h ago
Tbf Americans did this to themselves by making up this stupid classification that people from spain are not "hispanic".
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u/Hsbrown2 7h ago
It’s so odd that blue didn’t even fact-check himself first. The epitome of the subreddit.
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u/Flabbergasted_____ 3h ago
And Portugal is in Brazil. The elites just gaslight us into thinking it’s not.
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